~*~ EVERLASTING ~*~
No more torturing moments,
With those so called people who cared,
No more always thinking im respected,
When really,
They didn’t care for you from the start,
Those twisted clandestine thoughts,
Of detestation and suicide,
Or concern for the world,
No more forever scared,
By those moments that fear you the most,
The moment’s from the past,
No more of these tears,
The tear’s I have cried,
Able to be drowned in my own misery,
The anguish,
I so longed to liberate,
No more petrified moments,
Of never being obtainable,
Or even existing,
I can’t fight that battle anymore,
I no longer have that power,
To grasp the world in my hand,
To think there is a way to save everyone,
For everyone to have perpetually a gratitude,
But still,
There is not care in the world,
Do I really have a soul?
Could everyone possibly know?
My innermost judgment,
Will I be able to close my eyes?
To dream of such a wonderful place,
The place I am lastly loved,
Where I cannot feel any more pain,
The pain of humanity,
The pain of all people,
Who evidently cared,
In that case,
Perhaps I have no soul,
No core to feel,
It could be,
The individual tear’s I’ve cried,
All the pain I have felt,
Was just a indication of who I may possibly be,
Possibly to be immortal,
Never-ending~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
~*~ WONDERFUL THOUGHT ~*~
Oh, to be able to set there,
Sit there and watch you die,
To be able to look you in your face,
To be able to tell you,
How I really feel,
Never heard for so many month’s,
Finally letting everything out,
To see your blood shot eyes,
To witness your last grasp for air,
To be at your funeral,
While everyone is throwing roses,
With those cold and sad tears,
I will be throwing dirt,
With that smile of sigh and liberation,
You would finally be out of my life,
After all of my love you took from me,
After my heart you thoughtlessly stole,
Knowing I will never get my way,
Of taking your life,
Like you have taken mine,
Never to be the same,
Never to have such a satisfaction,
I am still here,
Still on this earth,
But living life as a dream,
With a life no longer to be lived~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
~*~ JUST A MEMORY ~*~
Am I really here?
To shelter all your fears,
Or are you just imagining,
All the lonely past tears,
Am I that Figment?
To keep you comfortable through the night,
Or just a ghost,
That help’s you during your fright,
I see your sitting there,
I’m listening to your thoughts,
Hearing you arrange your own death,
It makes me so distraught,
It really wasn’t your fault,
Your hurting so bad inside,
No help can I bring,
No way to confide,
Only if I could come,
To take away all your pain,
Thinking to myself,
If only I could explain,
It’s my entire fault.
Why I am not there,
To be able to inform you,
It was way too much to bear,
Now you’re watching them,
Lower me into the ground,
While I am here behind you,
Not able to make a sound,
If only you could see,
I didn’t mean to hurt you,
I couldn’t deal with the pain,
Everything was true,
Now you’re throwing a rose over me,
It’s all over now,
There’s nothing I can do,
Never can I avow~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
~*~ BROKEN WORLD ~*~
The pain of the world,
Cut's into my wrist's,
The blood that kept me alive,
Is now keeping everyone else alive,
My most hated,
Yearn to see me die,
They loved to see me hurt,
They all finally get their way,
Their way of destroying my life,
Their way of taking everything,
I hold so dearest to my heart,
Away,
Why does it make me content with myself,
To hold a blade agianst my skin,
Why do I feel like the world has been lifted from my shoulder's,
Like no one in this world could ever hurt me agian,
With my most hated surrounding my wound's,
The wound's from my wrist,
That are slit with pain,
They all laugh and smile,
They are finally happy,
So I can finally die with ease~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
~*~ SATISFY ~*~
I have the pain of hurt,
I have the pain of fear,
I love the feel,
Of a blade pressed agianst my skin,
The urges to see my own blood,
Draining my soul,
Tell I have nothing more to live off of,
These cut's are cut way to deep,
People say,
One day you will kill yourself,
One day you will die,
I want to hurt,
I want to hurt myself,
So others can't do it any longer,
So they can go and hurt someone else,
They can go and be their voices,
I will just go ahead and end my so called life,
To satisfy everyone else~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
~*~ LITTLE PIECES OF NOTHING ~*~
Why is it?
I can not control the way I feel,
The feeling of hatred,
The feeling of suicide,
Why is it,
I fall in love,
With the people I know will not love me back,
Why do I feel the pain of the world,
How can someone care for someone so much,
But still,
They over look it,
Continuously treating me like shit,
Until I finally break down,
Break down into little pieces,
Of nothing~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
~*~ DEADLY DREAM ~*~
I watch you bleed your life away,
Wondering if I should help your lifeless soul,
Really since your on of my worse enemy's to slay,
Someone who contantly stabbed me in the back with no control,
No one I could ever give a shit about,
As I watch the blood run out of your body,
I can't help but laugh to a point of shout,
That stupid bitch finally got what was long overdue,
Having no sympathy for you at all,
Even with your blood shot eyes,
Staring in dead observe,
I tell you as you fall,
You treated people like shit,
You got what your deserved,
In a loud deadly scream,
It was all just a dream~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
~*~ IMAGINARY FRIEND ~*~
Can you possibly live your life in fear,
Knowing that imaginary friend in your house,
Is really alive?
That figmit of your imagination that can never touch you,
Her face like a ghost,
That thought of her actually being a ghost,
Constantly in your head,
You tell yourself it was just to get attention,
Now she has blood seeping out of the walls,
Like water out of a faucet,
She was in your head,
A figmit no one else could see,
But still no one can see her,
But I can see her clearly,
Like you see yourself in a mirror,
She is there like the sun boiling the earth,
There is still nothing you can do,
But live with something,
You wish you never created~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
~*~ HARDLY THERE ~*~
What does it mean,
When your dream's have no meaning,
When you running around aimlessly,
From something with no mind no figure,
Your trying your hardest,
To get away from something that is not there,
Something that frightened you from the start,
But still your wondering why,
No one is there to help you,
When your running from something that is not there,
Tell sooner or later,
You can't run any longer,
That something that you thought wasn't there,
Is really there~!~
Written By: Shellane DeAnn Hokeah
