So I bought this unicorn off this old Mexican guy that used to pick coffee beans. I was totally stoked and brought it home and hit up BabyJesus to come by and take a look:
"dude, check out my unicorn"
"uhhhh, something seems not quite right"
"yeah, the only thing not right is that I got a TOTAL smokin' deal on him"
"nah, there's something else, but I just can't put my finger on it"
"man, you are just jealous because I got the multi-purpose pet from hell"
"multi-purpose?"
"yeah, I use him as a beer opener"
"what do you mean?"
"for cans I just puncture the top on his horn"
"what about twist-offs"
"no problemo, just use his teeth"
"and what about regular bottles?"
"easy! just lift the tail and...."
"oh man, where the hell did the cap go?!"
"don't worry about it, he'll pass it in about a week"
"so, all that is beer. how does that make it multi-purpose?"
"well, my girlie said she has been using it for some type of excercises"
"i gotta go...."
