SweetNESS's blog: "MY LIFE"

BOBBY, If tears could build a stairway And memories were a lane, I would walk right up to heaven To bring you home again. No farewell words were spoken. No time to say good-bye. You were gone before we knew it, And only God knows why. My heart still aches in sadness And secret tears still flow. What it meant to lose you, No one will ever know ______________________________________ To All My Friends and Family.. I found out on 10/13/07 that I had stage 3 cancer and I was rushed into surgery where I had the cancer removed. Bobby, Louis and my family stood by my side every step of the way. One month later Bobby and I are driving to get the staples removed where he held my hand every step of the way then too. What a life saver he was to me. On 11/20/07 we stayed up all night talking until we both fell asleep. I was leave on 11/21/07 to leave for Kansas to start Radiation Therepy. I woke up late about one hour until my flight left and I had not even got checked in yet. I did not want to wake up Bobby because it would of been so hard for us to say good bye. He was already having a really hard time with it. But he had made plans to come see me Dec. 22-Jan 5th which he had already taken off work to. I left a note saying I left for the airport, I then when I finally got into Denver and met my parents to drive to Kansas I got a phone call that Bobby had OD. I could not believe that this was happening. I expected to hear his voice and to this day everything would be fine. To this day I can't stop crying and my pain is not going away..I will forever miss Bobby and wish I would of done things differently. You would of been on that flight with me if I had to do things over again. I love Bobby very much and everyday I'll think of him as if it was our first day together. I am hearing alot of things that are far from true but I guess everyone has to have someone to blame..Blame me all you want,,Bobby knows I love and and would do anything for him.

I am the best, and worst friend, you will ever have! Celebs love me, no needles required, doctor approved! If my daddy Heroin is too strong for ya, I am the next best thing! You will fall in love with me...and I with you. I am so good to you, you will spend all of your money on me, take me everywhere with you, lie for me, steal for me, break other relationships for me, and maybe even die for me! But when I start to break it off...don't chase me! I know you will be in pain, but know that I still love you, and will be there for you later, just like the hoe that I am...because you know I can't be with you unless you have that $$$ You love to sleep with me, and when you're with me, all of your pain disappears. I fuck you so hard and deep, that I damage your liver...but no worries, see me again, and the pain will go away! I am considered a ladies man because well lets face it the bitches love me. They hide me in there purses, closets , medicine cabinets,under pillows, and even their asses. You can hook up with me at your local pharmacy or your neighborhood drug dealer, just ask. You can tell who been hanging out with me because they are usually constipated, moody,have a dry throat, restless,sluggish, depressed,extremely sedated, itching,dizzy, have a rash or just vomiting. But enough of that lets get some drinks!

Please sign my guest book under the Video Game section....thanks Sweetness... nobody is signing my damn guest book...that sucks.

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****URGENT URGENT PLEASE READ***** I AM GETTING SOOO MANY EMAILS THAT I CAN NOT KEEP UP WITH THEM. I WOULD BE SPENDING 24 HOURS REPLYING TO EMAILS. SO I AM VERY SORRY IF I CAN NOT GET BACK TO EVERY ONE OF YOUR EMAILS. PLEASE BE PATIENT I WILL TRY TO GET TO ALL OF THEM IN MY SPARE TIME.. AKA SWEETNESS!!!!

If you want 2 be added to my family. Please send me a email. Thanks. Marcie