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my life is an endless circle of false hope and broke dreams, its like im stuck in a deep dark whole and no matter how hard i try i cant get out and with so many people all around i scream so loud but no one will help, or maybe they just don't know im there, i feel like im the only one who knows ... anything .. anything about me, there are many who say they know me but in reality the only thing they really know about me is my name. im just me and me alone and confined within myself. i feel like no one will ever know who i really am, my world is no normal one, i see now what they mean when they say things that are exposed and presented to a child can have a lasting effect but i never understood until now, i remember such small things about my childhood that had such an effect on me, the way i think, act, and my very prospective of life itself .. maybe i dident see it then but i do now ... they say that when your just a child you feel nothing bad can happen, but i guess i was different because then and even now the only time i ever feel like nothing bad could ever happen is when im with that special someone, it may sound weird but when im with him i feel so safe and care free and a strange kind of joy takes hold of me, but then yet another aspect of childhood is seeing older people with so much pain and problems and you think "that could never be me" because you don't see the reality of life just yet, but the sad truth is that it is you .. just with time. when i was a kid i was going to be great .. the world was going to remember me .. but now im not great and when im gone when my life fades away to nothing .. no one will remember me or know my name, it hurts to know that all i will be is a reserved spot in the ground, and many many years down the road someone might be walking through the grave yard and come across a stone with a date long past and name that means less then the rock on witch it sits, they will think little of it but knowing or not there is a story in the box 6 feet below, it may not have Been the best story it may be very sad but told or untold for better or worse it was my story ...
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