I've known for awhile that my husband was gonna go out with my friend Andrea's boyfriend Drew. I was ok with that. Hell I'm ok with him going out with just about anyone as long as he is upfront,and honest with me. If you have nothing to hide then why be shady and lie about bs right??
Well,first Chad tried telling me he was going out with his brother,then it changed to he was going to this bar alone,and that he'd meet people there to talk to,then finally when I point blanked asked him if he was going out with his secretary from work (Carolina) he said to me "why would you think that?" I told him dont pull some bullshit on me and he finally fessed up that yeah he was.
I was not angry in the least about him going out with her, just the fact he felt the need to lie about it. It didnt make sense that if everything was on the up and up he would need to be shady. So I went there and confronted him about the lies. I was so upset I punched him and told him I dont appreciate the fucking lies. I also cussed her out because this bitch has been trying to get up on my husband since way before I had Isaac (over a year ago).
I didnt want to do more than that since the police dept was about 3 blocks from this bar and didnt feel like going to jail over some bullshit. It just angers me to no end is more salt in my wounds. You know if it was some other girl I could understand because I cheated on him, but you know we supposedly called a truce and were suppose to be working on things. Then this bullshit surfaced. He really hasnt been trying. I have,but he makes minimal effort. The things I do are never good enough, he tells me he wont help me with our kids because they are my "chore", he never notices the little things I do to look nice for him (shit all the guys around me notice and thank you for giving me so many wonderful compliments), no thank you's for the things I do in the house...I just feel so unappreciated,unloved and unwanted.
He told me last night that he's an asshole,and he knows he should treat me better but he finds himself saying unusually cruel things to me and regretting them later. He said he doesnt deserve me and i told him he's right he doesnt. He has no plans of changing and well I dont have plans of staying. I'd rather be alone then stay here and feel miserable. As scary as being alone is, it has to be somewhat better than this right? I dont deserve this treatment from him. I dont care what I've done to him, this shit is 10 times worse and has been going on for years. I'm finally to the point where it's push me over the edge. I.JUST.WANT.OUT.NOW *very sad* Thanks for reading ((hugs))
