uglypoet Random Thoughts Blog of a Avera...'s blog: "MuMM's Spawning Insight's"

Ok here we go another of those nights when my mind starts to run wild, based off others comments or questions directly to me..

I was asked how could i ask such odd mum questions after a insightfull thought i posted in my high tech blog about ipv6.

Well my answer was this, not exactly as this time i tend to imbelish on it on purpose.

What is a stupid or odd question? well in reality there is no such thing. We teach our kids there is no stupid question but as we grow as adults we tend to forget this. We then assume there are stupid questions from one adult to another. because we should know the answer. But in reality we do not know what each individuals answer will be. We know not the answer till we ask it. That is like assuming that everyone feels the presedent is doing a great job, we each have our own opinions on this, but do not know another exact answer untill we ask. That is like the one question i pondered, Does age reflect a person maturity, or just hint at it? i did not phrase it as such, but it is still the same. We do not know, some think age is a measure of maturity, while others belief it is but a slight marker at where they might be. I have my own opinion and that is for another time.

Back to asking odd questions, that we all assume everyone knows the answer to. This in itself shows that the limitness of the human condition and the things we see, do, and experiance lead us to what we question and how we question it.

To put it simply to be wise you first must relise you know little, but strive to know all. To do such a thing all questions must be asked. Like Galilo postulated with weak sceintific equipment that the earth revolved around the sun. Yet to ask that to people back then that knew what he knew and what the world concidered true, you would get diffrent answers. It would not be a stupid question at all to ask, for as he learned others views, he then could postulate his idea further, and in the process learn how to express it to others.

Thus the only stupid question is not the question but the person stating it is stupid. For they believe that we all think alike and see things the same way. And by this have shunted their mind and allowed ignorance to take a hold. They assume to know all when they know little, and understand no more then what they want to comprehend. It is those that ask odditiys for their own growth of knowledge and input that truely understand that.

There is no question, as those who strive to be wise, can only be wiser by accepting they know little and strive to increase their knowledge.

I think the whole adhd and add thing is a bunch of crap. I mean look at it right here on this site. There are people always complaining about how a MuMM is to long to read, and taking the time to say that in a comment. WoW it amazes me that these supposed adults have a lower attention span then a child these days. I have watched my nieces and nephews who can not spell yet, play Book Worm for hours, just tring to make words and sounding them out, while here on this site we have adults who think a 2 minute read of a poem is to long. This just proves to me that the whole attention defisate crap is just that crap. It should be called FALD.... Fat and Lazy Disorder. For those lazy asses who complain about reading, makes me wonder how they even got through high school if reading a mumm is to much for them these days. These same people piss me off cause they complain about everything in this country going wrong, when their attention is only long enough to watched a biased news report, hell half of them dont even have the attention span to use google and get more then one side of a story. WOW just wow... if our country would stop being so lazy i take that back if the adults in this country would stop being so lazy, then maybe they might be in a better postion in life. But they would rather complain, which is what they do not only on the internet but all the time. They do not relise to change things you have to put forth a effort, not put forth a complaint about how hard it will be. Dam... talk about a country going down hill, and a society world wide taking a turn for the worst. The internet is suppose to increase the spread of knowledge and understanding, but with the majority of idiots using it for pleasure (which i am one of at times like on this site) not worring about broading their horizons and expanding their understanding, they would rather just sit back, be lazy and complain how something is to long to read. Then they are the first person to jump up and admit it by saying oh man this is to long to read. However if you call them on that fact they get all huffy, funny how they can fight in a mumm for a hour proving their point that they are not lazy, but cant take the time to read a mumm. Infact most of them probably spent more time typing this is to long then it would have taken them to read it. Its a sad sad day when laziness expands into the easiness of reading, and those who feel that a attack on a person is better then just skipping over it since it would take less effort then the attack would.

It seems that from all the mumms out there two things always come to the top. relationships and sex. however if you pay attention sex is top of the heep. makes ya wonder, do people feel sex is the most important thing in a relationship? they constantly ask how many times, what postion ect. To me this means they seem to find sex most important, as if good sex is the key to a lasting relationship. while the relationship ones always are about distance. they never touch on what really makes a good relationship.. to me and to all those who have told me... that have good ones. its first and formost, friendship. you must find someone you can fully trust, and trust with everything. someone who does not judge you about your past but is willing to understand. well with that info i have always attempted to do this, but am unsure how i fair.. i would hope that i do well at this, and that things go well when i listen. I can admit i am a curious cuss at times tho and i tend to ask questions that may make the other person feel uncomfortable. When i am a person who strives to understand all i can about as much as i can, because i know when i die, i will have not used as much of my brain as possible. thus i will never fill it up with knowledge. for me understanding all i can, only makes me a better person. and to this day i understand this. Sex is important in a relationship, but for me more important then that is how you treat the one you love, and how they see you. being in love, only creates desire, emotional, as well as sensual desire. but each person has their priorities and it seems these days based on the mumms here sex is the key for most. it saddenes my heart to see such a development, that striving to show love to another, striving to create a relationship you can truley be proud of is avoided. Yet they always say the same things, a great relationship is one you build on before sex, its one that touches the heart and soul beyond any physical contact can ever accomplish. yet we as humans endevore to feel that touch, that closeness, probably because we were born with the feeling of being held tight and close in the womb of our mother. and that is probably why we desire contact above all else. it may not be right, but it is human nature. and those who can find love. are the lucky ones. for me im complicated and probably pretty odd, but i do know what real love feels like, and i also know what its like to lose it. That is probably one reason why i have avoided falling in love for so long. cause i try to live by my heart not my mind, and when i lose, it hurts for a long time.

These topics about relationships seem to come up very often in the MuMM's so here is my experiances and insights on this. I once met a woman online, and then moved to be with her, we were happy for about 2.5 years then it went downhill. No need to explain the situation its complicated and she was bi-polar so that was a major factor, my leaving was her choice not mine. But onto these topics. For me i see life in a diffrent way then most. See i look at life as a average person, because in many ways i am average. So with that said, you have to look at life on a day to day basis as we have no idea how many years we might have alive. Thus day to day is how i perseve things. And the average person in a 24 hour day sleeps 8 hours, works 8 hours, and has 8 hours to themselfs for the rest of their life. That means if you take your sleep and work and add them up thats 2/3rds of a day shot. And that translates into 2/3rds of your life gone. (Take into account im not counting weekends, because some people work 5 days while others work 6 or 7 so this is all based on averagaes) So when people ask about online relationships i have to say they can work, but there are two major factors that are needed. 1. Both people must believe finding each other online is no diffrent then finding each other downtown at a local bar, or store. For me online most times seems to be no diffrent then meeting someone in a bar, however i have noticed thru my experiances more often those found online, are less likely to be drunk, thus more likely to tell the truth more. 2. Both must also relise that online should be treated the same as a phone call, the only diffrence is really about the medium in which you communicate. It is funny how some think online is bad, chat rooms, instant messengers and so on, but they seem to forget about texting from a cell phone, its the same basic principal, just one is done with a pc while the other is done on a phone. this could come down to perceptions that most things online are open to the world, while your cell is more a private thing and number. But in reality they are both as private as you keep them and as public as you make them. So for me finding love online is very possible and in reality you have a better chance it would seem to me to find it online then you would downtown. not everyone lives in big citys so the internet is just a extention for them. It brings more possibilitys to them and provides them with a better opportunity to find the person who best matches them. As far as long distance relationships i fall back into a age old phrase. Well a couple of them. "The best things are the hardest to find or get." and "Distance makes the heart grow fonder." For me these are the two things i think of in a long distance relationship. But to make any form of a long distance relationship work not matte if its a 30 min drive vs a 2 day airplane ride. There are key things to keep it alive and well. 1. First and formost is communication daily, even tho you are seperated by distance this does not mean you should stop talking. If you were together you would be talking, so find a way to keep the communication alive, and talk daily even if its just for a few minutes. Do not let your talks interfear with your normal life, as this can cause more stress then the seperation. Find the right amount of time to talk, find the right time, and try to stick to it. That small schedualed time talking not only makes each other more comfortable with the distance, but it also helps to have something to look forward to. And it can help both to feel more like they are next to one another then seperated. 2. make plans to see each other as often and for as long as possible, but also remember unlss you can handle the distance for a long period of time, it is best to talk at some point, not to seriously but enough to let each other know at some point you will be together all the time. But visiting and making plans to visit helps alot, and gives you both something to look forward to. 3. finally you both must believe it will work, you must also both believe the distance is only a obsticale to be overcome at some point. do not let the distance creep in deep and make you doubt one another. let it prove to you how badely you want to be with each other, and let it help you to grow closer. These are my thoughts on these subjects, and maybe they might help you along your way into a online relationship or a long distance relationship, so it may succed. for those doing the long distance thing, i recomend using the internet to its fullest, find a messanger program you both like, get webcams and mics and use them when you talk at night if possible. this will help you to feel more like you are there rather then seperated. Remember the most important thing of all, life is short and love is forever.

My first blog created off MuMM's ..... I plan to write from time to time here about things i see in MuMM's either reocurring, or just in general because the MuMM spawned a thought or idea. For the first one i will be going on about the bad boy, nice guy, player mentality of woman and men. Remember these are only my insights of what i have read and how i see things personally. To many woman complain about how they can not find a nice guy. Well a MuMM reply to such a question spawned a bit of insight i had not ever known. The reply was the nice guy is the quiet one you shoot down after he buys you drinks. Kinda funny but now pondering that i am that guy. However this goes deeper. To many people these days are thick skinned, and cautious. Woman mainly, but men as well. What happens is we all tend to put on walls to protect ourselfs. We tent to follow what we know, which is the same old crap we have been through time and time again. The problem with this mentality and way of protecting oneself is two fold. First you are not allowing yourself to grow as a person, or grow in knowledge. You stiffle your own existance and ability to learn by blocking out new and unknown avenues. In this case the quiet person at the end of the bar. While he or she is the one who gets up early and goes home half sober or dead sober you are failing to see why they do this. They are the person who has responsibilitys and a life they are proud to take care of. They know going home early means getting up early, to start a day fresh and ready to accomplish what is given them. Your failure to recognize this as a type of person to get to know is the failure based upon the walls and missconceptions we all breed and learn from others. We think of party time as party time, its time to have fun, because life is short. While this is true, we must also relise life is really short and waisting all that party time with idiots only brings about a longer then wanted road to happiness. Secondly we as humans tend to forget what real happiness is. We tend to live in the moment rather then in the future. If we can break ourselfs of such a existance then our road to life long happiness will begin sooner and last longer. However noone likes change, and when we have to change ourselfs it makes us feel like we failed in some way. When we need to relise that if we do not relise when we need to change, we are failing even harder then when we do. The living goal of everyone who is happy comes from one constant insight into themselfs. Or at least in my opinion it comes from this one insight. That to be a good and caring person, we must first relise we are not perfect and that we are always in a state of growth and change. If we can embrass the concept of changing constantly to better ourselfs, then we are never caught in a downward spirl of a mediocore existance. People say you should not change yourself for anyone, while this is right and i believe in this with all my heart. They fail to see the ending of that statement which is you should always want to change yourself for the better, and do it for yourself not another. Then we come down to the reason for change, sometimes its obvious. Like we might tend to lie to much and relise it has become our normal reaction to things, so we see we must change. Othertimes it takes a individual to help us grow. We change not because we have to but because we must to insure our own happiness in a given situation. Or because our love for a individual helps to open our eyes to things we should change to make ourselfs a better person. I guess is all boils down to one thing the most important thing. Is happiness being stagnent and the same, or is true happiness found in growing, giving and learning how to improve ones self? This question only you can answer for yourself, for me its always growing, giving and learning. For if i stop growing then to me i am not a better man, i am just another man.