It's been awhile since i posted any of my thoughts, so i felt that it was time. I have been going through alot of change in my life, and i feel like i am going crazy, and at the same time i dont know if i am coming or going anymore. I hope that i have been there for anyone that needed me to be there. I truly feel left behind in many aspects of my life, like i am not wanted by some of the people that i care about and that alot of people dont understand me...i feel like i am missing out on my life sometimes. i have been in a rut for quite a long time, and i have been trying to change it. not been completely successful in that so far, but i am trying, i have great ambitions but at this point i feel like everything i want is out of my reach. and that i am not meant to have anything. life is hard to navigate when you are on your own, and i wish i could enjoy it more. i graduate in may and i dont feel that i am ready, i am excited yes, but so totally scared to death. i am afraid that i am going to stay stuck in a rut on my own with no way out, like quicksand.....