DEFINITLY TIRED OF ALL DRAMA IN LIFE. DO PEOPLE REALLY NEED THAT TO LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Well let’s see what can happen here. I guess I will tell you a little or a lot about me lol. Well I’m 5’-3” and I weigh about 138 lbs. I have brown eyes, grey hair. I have 4 kids (3 boys, 1 girl) those are 2 boys biological and 2 step kids I raised. And they consider me their Dad as I’m the only Dad they know. I quit high school in 10th grade and went into the US Army. Spent 4 years there and got out. I did everything from driving a cab to washing pots & pans. I started to drive truck like my father did. Well my Dad not the biological one. He is a great man. He raised me real good and we are closer now then we were back then. As it goes I was a teenager but I thought that I knew better then my father. Wow what a misconception I didn’t know shit lol. I drove semi till July 1979 when I had a semi accident I hit a bridge abutment and lost it fractured my spine. Thanks to God I survive with his help and my guardian angel. I never really thanked him I do so now “Thanks God” Well after that I spent 2 years in a metal brace. Which I was so ever glad when I got that off the first I did was to take a shower oh so sweet. I started to go to City College I got an Associate Degree in Drafting and Design Technology and what surprised me I graduated with honors I had a 3.9 GPA now why couldn’t I have done that in High School. I ended up divorcing the boys Mother because I got tired of the hospital stays the hospital bills. She was a manic depressive wells she was a good woman gave me 2 wonderful boys even if it took me a while to realize that. Now I have Clif as the oldest as I lost my oldest 5 years ago this May 16, 2004 so that anniversary if coming up. But then I think of him everyday since I lost him. Have you ever had something happen and you had no reason for it. I know when we were buying flowers for Jayme. I had an idea come to me and I bought flowers for him from his mother even though she preceded him in death. It was almost to the day she died that he died even though it was years a part. He was a good kid would give you the shirt off his back if you needed. He and I were mending fences and we would go to the movies and dinner. Maybe that is why I don’t go so much anymore. I play on my computer at a couple of sites or I watch things I have recorded with the DVR. Which get to be a bit sometimes? As I also have a collection of DVDs that need to be watch. I would have to watch a movie one a day for 3 months for them to be watched and hopefully not anymore would come out that I want to watch. I try to stick with those new releases I might want. I have 6 rubber maid tubs full of DVDs I have those in storage. I do like to be with people when I’m at work and I do at home but I squash that feeling on the weekend because I feel safe in my home as there is no one there to control me or manipulate me as the case had been. The few things I miss on the weekends are the conversation and the basic need of the interaction of being with someone. I have the kids when they come to rub my back a little as I need that for the human contact. Which believe it or not we all do. I know that I like sex now lol I guess not caring about it comes from being with someone for 11 years that was frigid. I can’t imagine how she had 2 kids lol but you have to have that relationship to be with someone to have the sexual part of it. LOL well I talk to family in Oregon and Indiana on the weekends and with Clif he is in Texas I call either then or sometime during the week. I also collect or at least I did till I ran out of room on the walls with that and the family pictures lol All my walls are covered lol I collected native American items, I have about 5 or 6 cars. I have a lot of DVDs as I said. I listen to C&W music, 50s & 60s and some blues. I also love Celtic music it is so cool especially you turn it on and go soak in a bubble bath. So sweet. I have 18 tattoos. Mainly American Native with a couple of dragons. I work as a civilian employee of the federal government I work for the US Army Corps of Engineers as Project Coordinator/As-built Technical manager. Been with then for 26 years now. I couldn’t have asked for a better place to end up working for. They have been good to me. I have been on 13 disasters from flooding to fires to hurricanes. I have received certificates, awards for my contributions. My own hometown paper did a one page article on me. Been trying to think of more to put on here. I know I like affection, massages giving as well as receiving lol who doesn’t. When you been hurt and used and the other half of the relationship didn’t care at all and felt nothing at your pain. So much for professing she loved me. Nothing like being a fool and it would not be so bad if it was once but to be a fool twice now that is against me. I just want to love and be loved back simple right well it isn’t so simple