I need to get this out here..tomorrow is going to be a big day for me at my lawyer's office. We are trying to tie up the loose ends so we can proceed on with my divorce. This has been a long time coming but I am the point where I just want this done. So to help remind me, I am going to write down all the bogus shit my husband has put me thru during our 7 yrs of marriage.
1. He has told me on several occassions that he is not physically attracted to me. He has wanted me to get a tummy tuck and boob job and was willing to fork over 10k to make it happen.
2. He has continued to let his family belittle me, trash me and run me into the ground. They had said things like on a scale of 1-10, I rated a 3, just recently they commented that I moved up to a 4.
3. There was time during my pregnancy I was unable to have sex due to it being painful or me being really sick. He threatned to cut off the cable,internet, and my cell phone if I didnt give him sex or a blowjob. His exact words were if I wasn't giving up the "fringe benefits" then he wasn't either.
4. While I was sick in the hospital with a blood clot in my arm he told me that I needed to quit being on "vacation" and that "I needed to come home so I could take care of my damn kids" While I was in the hospital my kids were not taken care of properly, if it wasnt for my my 1st son's dad Tom they wouldnt have been bathed or fed right. He tried to force me to sign out of the hospital againist medical advice even tho' my life and the life of our baby was a serious risk.
5. He badgers me about everything, he will keep hounding me until he gets his way. And unfortunately to keep the peace I find myself giving in even tho' that's not what I want to do. He badgered me until i signed away my rights to my other house and said that if I get into another relationship while we are married he will kick me out of the house I'm in and take my suv too.
6. He has cut me off financially, will not let me see my friends, does not help me much with the kids, and pretty much makes it where I'm left dependant upon him. He gives me an allowance of 5 dollars a day to live off of. Anything extra needs to be cleared and approved by him.
7. I have no idea how much money he has in the bank as he took away my card, and rights to the account. I have no idea if we are in debt, how much any bills are or anything. I dont even know how much he makes an hour now. I can guess but it's probably not accurate.
8. He has threatned that if I go after him for child support that he will quit his job as an engineer and leave me and the kids broke and homeless.
9. He is mentally ill (bipolar) and refuses to get help. He once told me that if I didnt let him go on a mission for god that something bad was gonna happen to our kids. That is what prompted me to get him help. After I got him help he then badgered me to death about how I broke his trust by having him committed and got extremely angry and picked fights with me daily over it.
10. If I dont want to have sex, he uses guilt trips or manipulation or just straight takes it to get what he wants. It doesnt matter what I say, he's head of household, and in the bible according to him it's what I'm suppose to do. I'm suppose to be the submissive wife.
11. He never cleans the house, he expects me to do everything and take care of our kids too. I never get a moment to myself.
Ok, there is more but I'm finding myself choking up and breaking down here. It is just so hard to see it all in print. I dont know why I stayed so long, but all i know is that now I gotta get out. I know I deserve better than this. I just need support and love from my friends to get me thru this. I know I got that from many and I'm very appreciative of it. Some of you do not know how much I look forward to chatting with you. It really makes my day. So thank you for the little things. ((hugs))
