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Loving til it hurts.....

Did you ever love someone so much it hurt? Someone in my life I love dearly unfortunately is not with me at this time. I love him so much he is all I think of...from the time I wake til the time I sleep. The spiritual connection we have is so strong, I have never felt it like this ever in my life. He supports anything I do and is always there for me. In the past I have been so damaged by relationships. My ex husband married my ex best friend. That alone with all the other cheating lying men in my life that proceeded my 16 1/2 year marriage made me so untrusting of situations that I think I chase people away from me, or I have a mental "block" and think the worst in situations before I have all the facts.Funny how things work out in my life...I happen to be in a discussion this evening about my defects and my shortcomings. One thing I had said was I have to stop feeling and acting like a toddler...fear of losing something that really isn't mine or not getting what I think I should get....A truly humbling experience that I should listen to. I do not want to lose this person but I fear my emotions will drive him away. I just can't leave before the miracle happens. Right now I just needed to get that out.... I Love you Baby...so much ~D~ Yang oxxo
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