xLx's blog: "Lost Soul"

You pass me on the street and our eyes briefly meet

You hold the door open for me as I enter behind you

I say thanks, but you have no idea that my mind is blank

In the elevator, you crack a joke. I flash a smile,

You have no idea that my heart is in denial

You ask me how my day was and I say fine

You have no idea that my brain and I are arguing to if I should cross the line

My happiness is gone as I walk in this world

The thoughts in my head have me wishing I was laying in a cold dark hole

Once you lose your soul there is no turning back

Everything you once dreamed of no longer has an impact

You don't want to love nor do you want to have fun

Your days are so long the problems in your mind make you question if you should carry on

You smile so that's what people see on your face

They think that you are happy but deep down inside yo feel like a worthless disgrace

Each day the performance you put on for people is Emmy award winning

But you question yourself and wonder if your act is just a way for you to hold off your own internal sinnings

When you wake up from a night's sleep you wonder to yourself if today is the day your heart

will be back to its old self or will it still be skipping every other beat

You wonder if things that once made you happy to be alive will make a comeback

You wonder if the little things in life that made you who you are will have you once again dreaming to the stars

You wonder if you will feel less empty hearted

You wonder to yourself who holds the match to start that fire

You're tired of running and losing your breath

You want to hold tight to something that will help you once again enjoy the journey into lifes amazing treks

You want to feel that every day can be better than the last

You want to turn your lost soul feeling into a thing of your past...