Lillith Black's blog: "Monsters Down Below"

By Lillith Black (with Lexa Vonn)

Our bus out of Cleveland arrived late without any notifications and the vending machine stole the money I deposited for a bottle of water. The bottle just sat there in the machine, mocking me like a liquid filled middle finger. Gina changed buses in Buffalo, as her ticket was routed differently than mine. I'm pretty sure my bus hit just about every city and town in upstate NY. I suspect the blame may have been pinned on me on the last bus ride due to my fashion, since I seemed to be taking on the appearance of a Hell's Angel while I traveled. With my biker jacket, unkempt hair, skin tight pants and backpack, I guess I looked a bit threatening. On this ride, I was more likely taken for a homeless girl, as I had already been on the bus for a day and a half to two days, still in the same make-up. I at least had the good sense to change clothes before getting on the bus, which is more than I can say for most of the people on there.


The New Haven bus/train station had that certain old fashioned dirty charm. It was prettier than Port Authority but scarier, due to the fact that K-9 units were sniffing around outside and there were screaming crack addicts lingering everywhere. With the screaming crack addicts and all, I decided quickly that I didn't want to wait around and headed straight to the ATM to withdraw some cash for a cab. It cost a staggering $15.00 to go only 10-15 minutes away and the driver didn't quite know his way around. It turned out my AirBNB room was in the ghetto, or at least next door to it. I was feeling a bit apprehensive until I was greeted by my hosts, who were actually quite generous and personable. We stayed up a good part of the night talking. The housing situation ended up being surprisingly nice. I had an entire room to myself and it sure beat sleeping in bus stations like I did on the last Marilyn Manson tour. My hosts didn't even mind driving me the 20 minutes it took to get to the venue. I didn't quite arrive until 12:30/1:00pm, which freaked me out a little since most of the time I prefer to arrive at the venue 8am or sooner. I was already craving a drink, but opted to leave my flask of absinthe behind this time in case there were metal detectors. Luckily, I was greeted by a small crowd of acquaintances who cheered when I arrived and amply passed around Bourbon laced cupcakes, Jameson, and wine. The food and booze made the 20 degree weather a bit more tolerable and the wait was much more enjoyable amongst the small familiar crowd. I always feel like half of the fun is meeting up with and making new friends when I go to MM shows. It's like a second family.


When it was time for venue staff to let us in for the Meet & Greet, we were quickly ushered into a waiting area where I began to worry about Gina, who hadn't managed to get there yet. It turned out her bus was running behind schedule and she literally made it into the Meet & Greet only moments before Manson arrived. That, combined with my lack of sleep had me feeling less than myself, so I pretty much panicked and didn't say anything when I approached Manson this time. I just gave him another Bible page, along with a few other goodies as an offering, and got a photo that wasn't nearly as good as the one from the previous night. I'd later regret not having my head together in the moment, as I would've liked to talk to Manson more. I also wish I would've prepared myself for the photo this time. The photographers at these things are kinda quick, so make sure you are ready! Oh, well… there was always tomorrow! Besides, it's the show that really matters. As long as I could get my spot up front and be at one with the music, I'm a happy camper. Unfortunately, the setup at The Dome is not favorable in comparison to other venues I've been to. The barricade was farther from the stage than usual and the security was problematic with where we were allowed to put our bags and coats.




The locals in the crowd were a bit odd, as well. They were mostly really young and just didn't seem to grasp the concert experience. I'd guess many of them were seeing Manson for the first time, which is great in the way that his fan base is still growing, but awkward for those of us who understood the concept of audience participation and communion. They didn't understand that you are supposed to start cheering as soon as the lights go out so the band can feel the excitement of the crowd building before they actually hit the stage. After a few failed attempts by the veterans to get the crowd chanting, the curtain finally went down. I'm not positive, but I think Suspiria may have been played this time as well, along with the usual reciting of Macbeth. As soon as the curtain went down, I regretted wearing two lace shirts and a bra since I had to go through the complicated procedure of taking off all three in a rowdy pit before the curtain was completely out of sight. I made it to my usual spot against the barricade, but got stuck with two obnoxious teenage boys behind me. Apparently, their parents worked there as venue security. It was quite obvious that they had never been in a real pit before and were using it as an excuse to knock people around unnecessarily. During the show, they kept hitting and pushing me beyond what is standard for being in the front row. Usually, you get pushed and crushed from people trying to get closer to the stage, but the actual moshing happens more in the center of the pit. So eventually, I got fed up with it and gave the more obnoxious one a steel toe kick of the boot, to which he responded in typical teenage male fashion, "do that again and I'm gonna hit you in the head like a guy!" I responded back with my usual catchphrase reserved for concert assholes, "if you can't take the pit, get out!" In retaliation, he kept screeching into my eardrum for an encore halfway through the show. Does this idiot even know what the word "encore" means?


The set began with "Hey Cruel World/ Disposable Teens," and although the crowd didn't grasp the concept of screaming before they saw the band appear, they sure went crazy once they heard the music! I spent a good part of the show trying to keep from losing my spot against the barricade, while also attempting to signal Manson, who eventually rewarded me with another crumpled up newspaper to add to my ever expanding collection from previous tours. During "Love Song," the audience was assaulted with the fog gun. I was kinda off to the side, so it didn't hit me as much as I wished. There's nothing like receiving the cool ejaculation of mist in your face when you are sweating in a pit! The usual "teenage rape candidates" lyrics were directed our way during "Slo-mo-tion." Somewhere mid-sentence, Manson did a slight Elvis impersonation and asked the crowd to point out the whore in the room. The newbies were confused by Manson's sense of humor until he delivered the punchline, "you were supposed to point at me!" I guess people don't expect the Antichrist to be funny, but his in-between song banter is actually quite hilarious if you're paying attention. I also think it provides a nice contrast to some of the more emotional moments such as the performance of "Coma White," which hits me like a bullet through the heart every time. Manson has been using a glove that projects red lasers out of the fingers during "Coma White" on this tour. He sometimes uses the lasers to single people out, which he did to me that night, right as he sang the lyric, "to save her from herself." With Manson's hat cocked halfway over his face and snow falling, the scene just screams tragedy and never fails to make me teary eyed.





He spent a good part of the show kneeling at the front of the stage, reaching out to the fans that managed to get up front. I was met briefly by another asshole, who shoved my friend Tater's mom in an attempt to knock her out of the way and got my elbow in his face instead. I had to fish the poor woman back to the rail where she could hold on and steady herself. "Sweet Dreams" was also especially intense that night, as we were greeted with Manson wearing a veil and swinging a shop light, not dissimilar to the one in the "Sweet Dreams" video. Midway through the song, he starts to crawl around on the floor, wipes himself with a sweat rag, and throws it into the audience. Luckily, another friend of mine deservingly caught it. Then, Manson proceeds to start humping one of the front speakers as the song slows to a dramatic end. I started saluting again during "King Kill/Antichrist," just as Father (we always called him "Daddy" back in the day, now I call him "Boss" hehe- Lexa) reappeared with his megaphone and proceeded to climb the shock symbol podium. An American flag was tossed into the audience and caught by an extremely dedicated and well-deserving Bible throwing fan. It's always nice to see the fans you can tell are really emotional catch a gift, even if it's not always me. Manson and the crowd were feeding off each other's energy in a vicious cycle during this song. It's as if the mere site of that podium induces everyone into a trance. I wondered if it was the same podium he used on the actual Antichrist Superstar tour back in the day? If so, I bet that thing has absorbed many mystical energies!


After that, it was time for the usual finale, "Beautiful People." True to form, Manson stormed the stage again for the last song and gave it his all. The audience was frenzied and continued to push as hard as possible to reach out to him. After a dangerously good and somewhat violent show, Manson at long last, left the stage. But the crowd was far too riled up to let the band get away so easily. The screams from the audience grew to a deafening roar demanding an encore… ya know, the bonus song that sometimes comes AFTER the finale, NOT in the middle of the show! After much screaming and pounding of feet, Manson calmly returned to the stage. He jokingly called for everyone to shout out their name, promising that he would instantly remember them all. Almost as soon as they responded, he got down on his knees and proceeded to howl and scream as the band blasted into "Hate Anthem." This was a special treat because they don't always do an encore, so we were overflowing with exasperated excitement! From start to finish, Manson didn't hold back in his performance. In fact, the encore was my favorite part that night! At "rape the raper" he was pointing in our direction, but that could have been because Gina had it written across her chest this time.


As the band crashed through the song ending with a skidding halt, Manson takes his final bow and exits the stage, leaving the crowd a wanton sweaty mess. My intel is a bit limited on the details of the after-party, as the rest of my contacts and I both failed at really getting anywhere. It was simply way too cold that night to survive waiting outside by the buses in hopes of being invited on, which always may or may not happen. Instead, Gina dropped me back off in New Haven, only to find out that my hosts were in NYC for a bit and the deadbolt key sticks. So, I was stuck waiting on the porch freezing, which was time that could've been better spent waiting by the buses. Finally, the neighbor came down to let me in. I got a few hours of rest and then it was off to the Greyhound station to do it all again!


Stay tuned for Part III, coming to ya next week!


-This message has been approved by Marilyn Manson