I live on a secluded farm of 70 acres. As if I weren't alienated from the natura;l world, there was a gate just put at the entrance to the property! I'm stir crazy!
I just got new boots to wear during the day and night while I rest to help my foot pain to give me a break. I bet I paid a fortune for those damn uncomfortable things and they aren't evewn Jimmy Choos.
My walker is worn slap out and I'm refusing to use a granny cane or wheelchair. I'm 36 and my body hates me. If I'm not swaying forward and back or side to side, I'm falling.
I thought I was doing all right for what I have to deal with, but it occurred to me tonight that I don't have much quality of life. That's a dangerous revelation. My family and my closest friends sustain me, but I can't help feeling like I'm an emotional vampire. I hate being so damned needy. I miss sex and everything fun and pleasureable I used to do.
Ok, I'm done with my pity-party; I'm off to swallow some xanax, klonopin, valium, benadryl, and anything else that will keep me out of pain, vertigo and something to make me sleep like the dead.
I'd much rather be swallowing a cock. *pout*
Sweet dreans my friends,
Ashleigh
