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What are you waiting for?
1. saying "hey micro dick get off....." isn't nice... neither is "are you in yet?"
2. dont ask the pussy how "it" feels
3. if the vagina has teeth stay away...
4. When in the middle of sex, making whale calls is not suggested.
5. Medication is available for sudden erection loss...
6. Ladies, if the mans penis is about to enter the vagina and goes limp... be sure to varify what "team" he is playing for.
7. When having sex, be sure to know the girls name...
8. When thinking of how many people you slept with, those who lasted less than 5 minutes don't count...
9. When a guy says he is "as big as a horse," you will be dissapointed...
10. Men who talk about them having a very large penis, naturally have a very small one.
11. casual conversation about the wheather is a sexual turn off...
12. Herpes: The gift so nice, you should give it twice.
13. eating during sex isn't a good impression...
14. sex at "super-sonic" speeds is not a fun experiment...
15. farting during sex will kill the mood 9 times out of ten....
16. If her name is "sparkle" or "delilah" or something odd like that, leave him alone....
17. golden showers don't retain their value.
18. If she can willingly accept you fisting her, it can be gaurenteed that your penis will not satisfy....
19. "Surprise buttsex" can be construde as rape...
20. Just because she has only had anal sex and never vaginal sex, doesn't mean she isn't "used product"
21. It is best to be quiet, than to sound like a cow in heat...
22. If the guy asks you to stick your finger/s in his butt when having sex, he may have deeper psycological issues than what you might be willing to deal with....
22. the penis, fingers, and dildo, are the only things that should be incerted into the vagina. Banana, cucumbers, beer bottles, and pine-apples are not suggested....
23. Sounding like a wookie is also not suggested...
24. Leaving a cucumber in the vagina for six weeks turns it into a pickle...
25. If the vagina regularly farts and you can smell it, don't touch it....
26. Don't have sex with pregnant women lest the child drop kicks your dick (subnote: it's there space, not yours)
27. even though they say "seek medical help for an erection lasting over four hours," don't worry. Most men wish it would last more than four hours.
28. "69"ing is fun, unless she's choking...
29. Hickies are not a method of marking your territory...
30. sex in public should be discreet...
31. telling a girl she to tight ...... wtf is wrong with you.
32.in the middle of sex dont start crying....
33. phone sex is not going to get a girl off....
34.choking a girl til she cant breath in the middle of sex is going to turn her off .....
35. waking up to him looking at you like he wants to kill isnt a good thing and him saying right in the middle of sex i can see you .
36. him saying can you taste the rainbow in the middle of sex is creepy .
