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living in mosiac world

I look out my window now and i see so many things . ive never knew what it was to live here in this part of twon until now .. there are things which you wouldnt believe to be true until you see it with your own eyes .. i guess i lived in a sheltered enviroment moslty and my eyes have been opened to a different world , but i still think  its not the place thats bad , its a few people who do , with thier own choices .. i think i could sense the fear  the of doing something to upset the ones in power .. the the unspoken leaders , i don't know who they are and don't want to find out . as i walk down the street the cars drive by slowly and i try not to watch the things which go on , i try to pretend im somewhere else , maybe even back home sometimes ..  and then i remember my fathers world his cruel but honest words " it was your cohice to come here .... "

 as if all my problems and challenges fade away with only those words .. but they don't my heart has been split in two , i gave half of it to my ex and to my daughter  and half to my family back home ..

don't even try to walk in my shoes and tell me how to live .. cause i wont do that to you .. i wont make excuses for who i am , and my challenges and my failures ..

lifes a journey we continue to travel in , one person can change your life in a moment , one day  open or break your heart .. we lived in such troubled times .

a good sense of humor , morbid at times has helped me deal with so much .. a great deal of patience and humilty which i try to use to help others through the tough times .. my good friends are incredible we have each others backs..

 and yet when you when you think you challenge is over , another comes like a big wave and alomst knocks you off your feet , but you have to get back up .. before the next  wave pulls u down and under .. noone wants to drown ..

whatever doesnt kill you makes you stronger .. stronger then you ever knew you could be .. so never give up... giving up is the only way to fail ..

 

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