SwEeTHoNeY's blog: "Missing the Past"

So, today is a very important day in my life. My mother's birthday. I bought her 2 dozen roses (all diffy colors) that I'm sure she'd love. Sunday will mark 10 months since she' left our lives. Everyday has been hard especially when I get good news in my life, and she was the only one that I would share it with. This week I found out 3 great things, but after I heard them was at lost who to turn to. I called the 7 people most important to me, and just got their voicemails, and just sat there crying. Then, I just started to think she's with me in my heart and she knows the great things that I am accomplishing. It' was hard to even turn in my graduation papers in because I know she wanted to see my graduate, but she will see me from heaven, and be with me along the whole way.

So, I've been just trying to keep positive through this fall/winter months. The holidays are coming, mid-terms, trips, and just life overall is happening so fast for me. I guess I'm writing this for two reasons to vent out my feelings that i miss my mother so much, and the second reason for someone or just people to read this and not take their days for granted because you never know what will happen tomorrow or the next minute even.

When we brought her home from the hospital that day we all thought we would have months or even years left with her, and I even planned to stay home 24/7 just for her, and take online courses. I had planned everything through my University. I had learned how to adminster her meds etc. Then, the next day she wouldn't wake up. It was hard. Still is. As time goes on I feel it will never get easier, but I smile because she would want me to. I keep going on because of her. So please. If you take anything outta this always tell the people that are important to you that you love them, show them you do like it's yours or their last day on earth. Have an awesome day/week/month/year everyone.