Over 16,514,110 people are on fubar.
What are you waiting for?

Mattenheimer's blog: "Just Matt"

created on 08/02/2008  |  http://fubar.com/just-matt/b236017
Just Matt - At a cross road again... A whirl wind of emotions, Conflicting desires, wants, and needs Strong battling notions of remorse, regret, and fear of the future Who am I any more? What am I looking for? There was a time, but I can’t remember when I was happy, understood the vast world around me… I knew what made me tick, had the answers to it all… Or so I thought….. Then…. CRASH… my world was shattered… Everything was a lie… all my beliefs, core values, All the trust, love, commitment, and loyalty I gave… Thrown away… Everything in my small realm of experience… Was shattered in to tiny little pieces of Matt that can’t be put back together… So, time to build a new Matt… I’ve been pawing through the rubbish… finding a small piece that will fit… Diligently I push on in the pursuit to find a piece of me… Finding pieces I’ve never seen before… putting them together once more… I’m finally starting to make a form… nothing like it was before… I never imagined I’d turn into this… Is this really who I am?... “Accept it” I tell myself… “be content with the new you”… “Yes, everything you believe, you basic construct, has changed, but it’s you”… So finally… I start to see the light, a new path to follow… Unique, never have I seen it before… finally feeling comfortable in my new form… I’ve been looking hard, searching, seeking… and just when I think I know what I am… Or so I thought….. CRASH… I’m shattered again…. Starting over… I face the simple questions that get so complicated…. What do I want? What do I desire? What do I need? Will there ever be a path to happiness for me? Is there true love? Is love just a passing fancy? Will any one ever take me for who I am? And if not… what do I have to become? I had a friend tell me once…. “Matt, there are many simple men with complex needs… Many complex men with simple needs…. You’re the rare outsider… A complex man with complex needs” I know that is was said with good intentions, but is there an answer to the riddle of me? Why can’t there be a plan…. WHO THE FUCK AM I? And so start the ramblings of lost man.......
Leave a comment!
html comments NOT enabled!
NOTE: If you post content that is offensive, adult, or NSFW (Not Safe For Work), your account will be deleted.[?]

giphy icon
last post
15 years ago
posts
1
views
554
can view
everyone
can comment
everyone
atom/rss

recent posts

other blogs by this author

 15 years ago
Auto 11 Auction
 15 years ago
Random Thoughts
 15 years ago
Just Matt 2
official fubar blogs
 8 years ago
fubar news by babyjesus  
 13 years ago
fubar.com ideas! by babyjesus  
 10 years ago
fubar'd Official Wishli... by SCRAPPER  
 10 years ago
Word of Esix by esixfiddy  

discover blogs on fubar

blog.php' rendered in 0.046 seconds on machine '180'.