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Today i woke up... thats alwayz a good sign.
why is it that fat ugly dudes seem to think hot chicks r more likely to talk to them on the internet?
i gotta say. just cause there are more sexy chicks these dayz doesnt mean we get to up our standards even furthe dudes for real if she looks good, and plays nice, cash in b4 u crap out man for real! ur not gods gift to women...... i am... THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!!!
haha yeah riiiight. there ladies, i said it for u.
just so u know... obama sucks... just thought id clear that up.
did u hear the one about the chicken nuggit and the tampon?... me neither. sounds like a real riot tho dont it?
i ate a browny once that made me high. they said it had hash in it... to this day i wont touch hash browns, corn beef and hash, if it sayz hash! fuck it! i gained 10 pounds off those brownies!
if u try to hard to pronounce marlboro it WILL drive u nuts! you know what will piss you off... waiting for someone to "im" you back... you ever thought about that? i be like," BITCH its called 'instant' messages!" its supposed to happen "instantly" fast, easy, like talking. if you gonna take ten fuckin minutes to hit me back just send a regular old message then shit. ill go grab a drink, catch an episode of reba or something i got shit to do!
red bull gives you wings... shit when it first came out the only thing it gave you was a coke benge. it had actual cokain in it. man how the fuck you supposed to explain that shit to your probation officer? " But it gives me wings man!" go to rehab and shit like... " Im kaleb"..."HI kaleb"..."and it has been three days sence my last energy drink." *clap*clap*clap* " i gotta think about the kids!"
why the fuk do ppl say text phraises out lound in a conversation? "I'LL BRB TTYL." how lazy can you get that your really actually stressing those other 18 letters. i love beer. just thought id throw that in there. at my job they tell us no smoking on the propperty. yet they put not one but two ashtrays by the front door. why? so now we gotta put it out over here and then pick it back up and walk fifteen fukn feet that way to put it in the ashtray... fuck that ima stand at the edge and fire fly that bitch in there and hope it makes it.
