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OK Guess what the one and only DJ Irish Eyes is up for auction . come show her how much you want her by bidding on her . dont let the red hair fool ya she is a sweetheart and she is def worth anything you bid on her . just click on the pic and start ur biddin .
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Bipolar disorder, also known as manic-depressive illness, is a brain disorder that causes unusual shifts in a person’s mood, energy, and ability to function. Different from the normal ups and downs that everyone goes through, the symptoms of bipolar disorder are severe. They can result in damaged relationships, poor job or school performance, and even suicide. But there is good news: bipolar disorder can be treated, and people with this illness can lead full and productive lives. About 5.7 million American adults or about 2.6 percent of the population age 18 and older in any given year,1 have bipolar disorder. Bipolar disorder typically develops in late adolescence or early adulthood. However, some people have their first symptoms during childhood, and some develop them late in life. It is often not recognized as an illness, and people may suffer for years before it is properly diagnosed and treated. Like diabetes or heart disease, bipolar disorder is a long-term illness that must be carefully managed throughout a person’s life. What Are the Symptoms of Bipolar Disorder? Bipolar disorder causes dramatic mood swings—from overly “high” and/or irritable to sad and hopeless, and then back again, often with periods of normal mood in between. Severe changes in energy and behavior go along with these changes in mood. The periods of highs and lows are called episodes of mania and depression. Signs and symptoms of mania (or a manic episode) include: * Increased energy, activity, and restlessness * Excessively “high,” overly good, euphoric mood * Extreme irritability * Racing thoughts and talking very fast, jumping from one idea to another * Distractibility, can’t concentrate well * Little sleep needed * Unrealistic beliefs in one’s abilities and powers * Poor judgment * Spending sprees * A lasting period of behavior that is different from usual * Increased sexual drive * Abuse of drugs, particularly cocaine, alcohol, and sleeping medications * Provocative, intrusive, or aggressive behavior * Denial that anything is wrong A manic episode is diagnosed if elevated mood occurs with three or more of the other symptoms most of the day, nearly every day, for 1 week or longer. If the mood is irritable, four additional symptoms must be present. Signs and symptoms of depression (or a depressive episode) include: * Lasting sad, anxious, or empty mood * Feelings of hopelessness or pessimism * Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness * Loss of interest or pleasure in activities once enjoyed, including sex * Decreased energy, a feeling of fatigue or of being “slowed down” * Difficulty concentrating, remembering, making decisions * Restlessness or irritability * Sleeping too much, or can’t sleep * Change in appetite and/or unintended weight loss or gain * Chronic pain or other persistent bodily symptoms that are not caused by physical illness or injury * Thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide attempts A depressive episode is diagnosed if five or more of these symptoms last most of the day, nearly every day, for a period of 2 weeks or longer. A mild to moderate level of mania is called hypomania. Hypomania may feel good to the person who experiences it and may even be associated with good functioning and enhanced productivity. Thus even when family and friends learn to recognize the mood swings as possible bipolar disorder, the person may deny that anything is wrong. Without proper treatment, however, hypomania can become severe mania in some people or can switch into depression. Sometimes, severe episodes of mania or depression include symptoms of psychosis (or psychotic symptoms). Common psychotic symptoms are hallucinations (hearing, seeing, or otherwise sensing the presence of things not actually there) and delusions (false, strongly held beliefs not influenced by logical reasoning or explained by a person’s usual cultural concepts). Psychotic symptoms in bipolar disorder tend to reflect the extreme mood state at the time. For example, delusions of grandiosity, such as believing one is the President or has special powers or wealth, may occur during mania; delusions of guilt or worthlessness, such as believing that one is ruined and penniless or has committed some terrible crime, may appear during depression. People with bipolar disorder who have these symptoms are sometimes incorrectly diagnosed as having schizophrenia, another severe mental illness. It may be helpful to think of the various mood states in bipolar disorder as a spectrum or continuous range. At one end is severe depression, above which is moderate depression and then mild low mood, which many people call “the blues” when it is short-lived but is termed “dysthymia” when it is chronic. Then there is normal or balanced mood, above which comes hypomania (mild to moderate mania), and then severe mania. A double-sided arrow listing range of moods, from severe mania to severe depression In some people, however, symptoms of mania and depression may occur together in what is called a mixed bipolar state. Symptoms of a mixed state often include agitation, trouble sleeping, significant change in appetite, psychosis, and suicidal thinking. A person may have a very sad, hopeless mood while at the same time feeling extremely energized. Bipolar disorder may appear to be a problem other than mental illness—for instance, alcohol or drug abuse, poor school or work performance, or strained interpersonal relationships. Such problems in fact may be signs of an underlying mood disorder. Suicide Some people with bipolar disorder become suicidal. Anyone who is thinking about committing suicide needs immediate attention, preferably from a mental health professional or a physician. Anyone who talks about suicide should be taken seriously. Risk for suicide appears to be higher earlier in the course of the illness. Therefore, recognizing bipolar disorder early and learning how best to manage it may decrease the risk of death by suicide. Signs and symptoms that may accompany suicidal feelings include: * talking about feeling suicidal or wanting to die * feeling hopeless, that nothing will ever change or get better * feeling helpless, that nothing one does makes any difference * feeling like a burden to family and friends * abusing alcohol or drugs * putting affairs in order (e.g., organizing finances or giving away possessions to prepare for one’s death) * writing a suicide note * putting oneself in harm’s way, or in situations where there is a danger of being killed If you are feeling suicidal or know someone who is: * call a doctor, emergency room, or 911 right away to get immediate help * make sure you, or the suicidal person, are not left alone * make sure that access is prevented to large amounts of medication, weapons, or other items that could be used for self-harm While some suicide attempts are carefully planned over time, others are impulsive acts that have not been well thought out; thus, the final point in the box above may be a valuable long-term strategy for people with bipolar disorder. Either way, it is important to understand that suicidal feelings and actions are symptoms of an illness that can be treated. With proper treatment, suicidal feelings can be overcome. What Is the Course of Bipolar Disorder? Episodes of mania and depression typically recur across the life span. Between episodes, most people with bipolar disorder are free of symptoms, but as many as one-third of people have some residual symptoms. A small percentage of people experience chronic unremitting symptoms despite treatment.3 The classic form of the illness, which involves recurrent episodes of mania and depression, is called bipolar I disorder. Some people, however, never develop severe mania but instead experience milder episodes of hypomania that alternate with depression; this form of the illness is called bipolar II disorder. When four or more episodes of illness occur within a 12-month period, a person is said to have rapid-cycling bipolar disorder. Some people experience multiple episodes within a single week, or even within a single day. Rapid cycling tends to develop later in the course of illness and is more common among women than among men. People with bipolar disorder can lead healthy and productive lives when the illness is effectively treated (see “How Is Bipolar Disorder Treated?”). Without treatment, however, the natural course of bipolar disorder tends to worsen. Over time a person may suffer more frequent (more rapid-cycling) and more severe manic and depressive episodes than those experienced when the illness first appeared.4 But in most cases, proper treatment can help reduce the frequency and severity of episodes and can help people with bipolar disorder maintain good quality of life. Can Children and Adolescents Have Bipolar Disorder? Both children and adolescents can develop bipolar disorder. It is more likely to affect the children of parents who have the illness. Unlike many adults with bipolar disorder, whose episodes tend to be more clearly defined, children and young adolescents with the illness often experience very fast mood swings between depression and mania many times within a day.5 Children with mania are more likely to be irritable and prone to destructive tantrums than to be overly happy and elated. Mixed symptoms also are common in youths with bipolar disorder. Older adolescents who develop the illness may have more classic, adult-type episodes and symptoms. Bipolar disorder in children and adolescents can be hard to tell apart from other problems that may occur in these age groups. For example, while irritability and aggressiveness can indicate bipolar disorder, they also can be symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, conduct disorder, oppositional defiant disorder, or other types of mental disorders more common among adults such as major depression or schizophrenia. Drug abuse also may lead to such symptoms. For any illness, however, effective treatment depends on appropriate diagnosis. Children or adolescents with emotional and behavioral symptoms should be carefully evaluated by a mental health professional. Any child or adolescent who has suicidal feelings, talks about suicide, or attempts suicide should be taken seriously and should receive immediate help from a mental health specialist. What Causes Bipolar Disorder? Scientists are learning about the possible causes of bipolar disorder through several kinds of studies. Most scientists now agree that there is no single cause for bipolar disorder—rather, many factors act together to produce the illness. Because bipolar disorder tends to run in families, researchers have been searching for specific genes—the microscopic “building blocks” of DNA inside all cells that influence how the body and mind work and grow—passed down through generations that may increase a person’s chance of developing the illness. But genes are not the whole story. Studies of identical twins, who share all the same genes, indicate that both genes and other factors play a role in bipolar disorder. If bipolar disorder were caused entirely by genes, then the identical twin of someone with the illness would always develop the illness, and research has shown that this is not the case. But if one twin has bipolar disorder, the other twin is more likely to develop the illness than is another sibling.6 In addition, findings from gene research suggest that bipolar disorder, like other mental illnesses, does not occur because of a single gene.7 It appears likely that many different genes act together, and in combination with other factors of the person or the person’s environment, to cause bipolar disorder. Finding these genes, each of which contributes only a small amount toward the vulnerability to bipolar disorder, has been extremely difficult. But scientists expect that the advanced research tools now being used will lead to these discoveries and to new and better treatments for bipolar disorder. Brain-imaging studies are helping scientists learn what goes wrong in the brain to produce bipolar disorder and other mental illnesses.8,9 New brain-imaging techniques allow researchers to take pictures of the living brain at work, to examine its structure and activity, without the need for surgery or other invasive procedures. These techniques include magnetic resonance imaging (MRI), positron emission tomography (PET), and functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI). There is evidence from imaging studies that the brains of people with bipolar disorder may differ from the brains of healthy individuals. As the differences are more clearly identified and defined through research, scientists will gain a better understanding of the underlying causes of the illness, and eventually may be able to predict which types of treatment will work most effectively.
so most of the ppl who actually spend time with me and talk to me know that 5:45 am august 21st i am catching a plane to louisiana to be with my fiancee (dj reaper for thoes of you who are dense or in the dark lol.) 15 dayz and ill be on that plane.... i just wrote my letter of resignation, i have hated my job for the last year and a half but writing this letter this morning i know i am going to miss it along with oregon all together. im starting a new chapter in my life and i know it will be totally awesome but its a lot harder to let this one go then i thought it would be. i will miss everyone and everything here.

why bother

you know, i am sorry that the minute i come home ppl want to automatically jump down my throat. i am sorry i am tired of ppl who are supposed to be my friends want to call me names. i am sorry that you all think i am such a fuckin bitch. i am sorry that you think everything i say is rude or with an attitude. i am sorry i have feelings and emotions. i am sorry that i dont constantly cater to all your needs. i am sorry that you seem to have nothing for me anymore then contempt. i am sorry my life is upside down and that everything i care about is slowly slipping away. i am sorry you dont seem to have time for me. i am sorry you dont care how i feel. i am sorry that i am such an inconvience to you. but you know what? if all this bothers you all then why do you pretend to care? why do you pretend to be my friend. why do you lie in my face? why bother at all? dont like me? dont deal with me. plain and simple.

come one down and kick it




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(repost of original by 'DJ Reaper ~ Liquid Deceptions Owner ~ Irish Eyes CT Hubby' on '2007-07-03 22:44:28') (repost of original by 'Irish Eyes * Liquid Deceptions Co Owner * ¢¾ Reaper's CT Wife ¢¾' on '2007-07-03 22:45:06') (repost of original by '~~Dj BaByGiRl~~' on '2007-07-03 22:45:44')

and fuck you very much

so i am sitting here on a boring sunday night kinda reading an kinda watching my lounge with my old man on air, good old normal ole life. when low and behold my ex bestfriend IM's me. says "did you move yet?" and i says "why?" and he says to me " jus didnt want to run into you at a bar or something downtown." so i reply with "dont worry you wont." he just got out of jail. now he was mad at me abd ended our friendship before he went in because i found someone who makes me happy enough that id move clear acrossed the country for. i love how they throw the word bestfriend around and try to dictate your life. fuckin awesome. i ended up telling him hes not my fuckin dad and he told me to grow up and then welcomed me to the iggy bin. gawd i am glad we were close. i love the way life is full of pretend fuckin ppl who use and use and use. i used to take him to the bar with me abd blow 100.00$ on fuckin 2 dollar beers in one night on just me and him. ofcourse now that i dont do that and my attention and time is somewhere else i am not worth the friendship. he never had shit to bring t the table. i gave and gave and still gave and all he did was take. but he was my best friend so what did it matter? he was someone i thought i was close to and so i was blind to it. so now heres me growing up and telling you adam faulkner to piss off and fuck you very much. i am sick of bring walked on and ppl wanting me to be miserable so i make them happy. not doing it anymore. i am going to take my chance and livemy life and do what makes me happy. so yes i am moving to louisiana. anyone who doesnt like it can join adam.

putting it behind me.

Im 27.... my life has been a long hard road. Already you could write a book on my life and wot i have been through. There are loads of things in my past i am not proud of, but that i would not change because they have made me who i am. I have spent the last half of my life hiding who i really am and closing myself off from the rest of the world. I didnt want to take the chance of getting hurt. On occasion i have met a boy or two who has made me think of wantng to come out of myself, but its never happened. I have always been afraid to take that last step. Untill now. Dont ask me how, or when....but someoen has gotten past every defense i have and i never even seen it comming. lol i was blindsided. All of a sudden a love song makes me smile again. Im dreaming of spending my life next to someone and doing stupid things like laughing till i cry and watching the stars. lol maybe even chasing lightening bugs.... Yeah i know, so not me. Thats where were ALL wrong. Im opening up again slowly. Im letting see me for who i am and amazingly he loves me that way. He actually wants me to be me. Lmao his crazy ass even thinks i am beautiful first thing in the morning when my har is one big red afro and my make up is fubar. Just the fact that he says i am beautiful and means it is enough to convince me lol. So yea i am putting the bullshit and the pain and all the drama behind me. That includes Portland, Oregon. We have decided on me moving out to louisiana in the next 3 months. This is my choice. I am happy and this is wot i want. if you are my friend then please dont ask me if this is wot i really want or if i am sure or if this is a good idea or be mad at me. i have goetten enough of that already. support me. If you have nothing nice to say about it then dont say anything at all. i dont want your shit. Baby i love you. :)

when ....

When you catch a girl glancing at you, she wants you to look back and smile _________________________________________________ When a girl bumps into your arm while walking with you she wants you to hold her hand _________________________________________________ When she wants a hug she will just stand there _________________________________________________ When you break a girls heart she still feels it when you run into each other 3 years later _________________________________________________ When a girl is quiet, millions of things are running through her mind _________________________________________________ When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply _________________________________________________ When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions, she is wondering how long you will be around _________________________________________________ When a girl answers, "I'm fine," after a few seconds, she is not at all fine *** _________________________________________________ When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are playing games _________________________________________________ When a girl lays her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be hers forever _________________________________________________ When a girl says she can't live without you, she has made up her mind that you are her future _________________________________________________ When a girl says, "I miss you," no one in this world can miss you more than that _________________________________________________ When a girl is mean to you after a break-up she wants you back, but shes scared she'll get hurt and knows you're gone forever *** _________________________________________________ Guy Facts: When a guy calls you, he wants to be with you _________________________________________________ When a guy is quiet, He's listening to you... _________________________________________________ When a guy is not arguing, He realizes he's wrong _________________________________________________ When a guy says, "I'm fine." after a few minutes he means it _________________________________________________ When a guy stares at you, he wishes you would care about him and wonders if you do _________________________________________________ When your laying your head on a guy's chest, he has the world _________________________________________________ When a guy calls/texts/comments you everyday, he is in love _________________________________________________ When a (good) guy tells you he loves you, he means it _________________________________________________ When a guy says he can't live without you, he's with you till your done _________________________________________________ When a guy says, "I miss you," he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else
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