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BikerChic's blog: "Julies"

created on 04/20/2008  |  http://fubar.com/julies/b208787
Bike Hoes Beware....Theyre Onto You!!!!! 1.If you have no bike but just happen to have your own helmet in your car we know your playing us for a ride. 2. If your gonna go for a ride go on with the niceest bike hes the one who is least likley to crash and kill you.If he has a nice bke hes prob. been ridding a while. If you go with a tool who has a 86 ninja 250 we are all gonna laugh at you.Plus use your head if his bike looks broke then so is he DUHHH! 3. If the bike is a "Stunt bike" or rashed up all over reconsider there is a reason its rashed up. 4. If your FAT! save yourself some embaressment and us the agrivation of trying to tell you no with out saying cuz YOUR FAT BITCH!!!! we can only be sooo nice. Use your head. 5.If your friend is ugly or FAT (See rule 4) it is not my responsability to get someone to take her. 6. If you have on a skirt then YES!!! we have to go first no one else knows how to get where we are going (Right guys ) 7. Showing your tits will get you selected first for a bike ride. 8.STOP!!!!! fucking bashing your helmet into the back of my 600 dollar helmet thank you. 9. Move back and stick your ass out your squishing my nuts. 10 Stop scratching my tank with your J-Lo ring set 11. Yes it is too possible to jerk me off while im driving my bike (Note: This will also ensure you another bike ride anytime) 12. It is customary to pay for motorcycle rides with oral sex. NOTE: If your skills arent up to par it is def. ok to have a girlfriend of yours assist you. Team work is what its all about.) 13. We know when a girls like the bike and not us if everytime we call its always the same shit can we go on the bike.....NO!!!!..... its fucking December bitch. 14. Dont lean this bike has one driver and it me so sit there and relax. 15. No your not gonna "GO FLYING RIGHT OFF" (Unless you piss me off then its a possibility) 16. Yes im gonna go fast stop being a pussy. 17. yes i just adjusted my mirrors to see your tits.
You Know Youre A REAL Female Rider If..... ya know you are a REAL female rider if you have experienced any of this :) 1.you have broke a nail on your clutch or front brake ....... 2.the only perfume you smell like is eu de exhuast....... 3.you have specific riding shoes so you don't have shifter marks on your cute ones ...... 4.your helmet has makeup on the inside of it ..... 5.you take the "windswept" hair look to a level never seen before... 6.you have spent hours trying to untangle your hair after a long day of riding ......... 7.you have tan lines on your wrists from wearing your riding gloves....... 8.you have had mascara in your eyes cause they were watering from riding so fast ....... 9.you have rode up to a restuarant or bar and had to go pick bugs off your face before you could go hang out with your friends........ 10.you have had to pull over to pull up your lowrise jeans cause your crack was showing ....... 11.you have rode past a cop at a hundred miles an hour and gotten off with a wave ....... 12.you have ripped out your earings puttin your helmet on or taking it off ......... 13.you would rather ride your bike than your boyfriend ........ 14.you would rather talk about fuel injected vs carbourated, than coach vs dooney ........ 15.you know that 600, 636, 650, 750, 900, 929, 999 are cc's for bikes and not area codes............. 16.you stopped wearing sandals cause you might be going riding..... 17.you have forgotten what heels are ........ 18.you would rather have clothes from icon, a star, joe rocket, than gucci, prada, or valentino......... 19.you have asked your boyfriend/husband for parts for your bike instead of jewlery........... 20.you have been asked by non riding guys to ride bitch on your bike and they are serious! ....... 21. You are always getting kisses blow at you or thumbs up 22. You just smile and nod at the guy trying to talk to you in the car next to you cause you cant hear him over your bike
Ok, so yesterday morning I had surgery to repair the damage in my leg...the bones weren't fusing together correctly so was repair now...or rebreak later. Rocket science as a decision here right? So, I wake up from the surgery bawling my eyes out. This one so much worse then the last. New rod, screws through the leg into the bone with a metal medevil contraption halo lookin thing. Throughout the day I keep telling Nurse Hatchett that the pain was out of control. She asks "scale of 1-10" I said 50, she laughed, I cried. she tells me not time for more meds yet. I look at her with disgust. I keep hitting the call button. She comes back in (is she the ONLY nurse on duty?) and threatens to take my call button away because i'm "whining". So, I told her gimme a saw, some screws, piece of metal and a hammer and we'd see how much SHE whined...she hated me. They said I could go last night if I felt up to it, told her now I knew where my drugs were and she should go to na meeting. She didn't find it amusing..but it did make the doc chuckle a tad, at which point I got more meds. So I at least got to sleep. I think she snuck in some drug for sleeping too but I didn't mind, made her life easier for sure! But then they kept trying to wake me up to see how I felt...are they serious? I think sometimes they need to be on the table themselves! Lets see, I was asleep so i'd say I was feeling very little pain...umm duhh! She finally got off shift, and the new one seems nice, we'll see how she is in 8 hours.
Since noone reads profiles, this is here for those who care or who wonder who I am. WHAT I LIKE: I LIke People That Can Honestly Speak Their Mind To Me & Tell Me What The Real Deal Is I Like People That Can Hold A Good Conversation With Me I Like People That Have A Sense Of Humor & Put Up With Mine I LIke People That I Can Trust In I Like People Who Like Me 4 Me & Not If I Look Good Or If I Had Money Etc I Like To Be Treated Like How I Treat Others I Like To Be Teased Because I Give It Back To Them 10 Times Worse I Like My Suzukirf600 (crotch rocket) I used to Like My HondaF4 (stunt bike) lol I Like Men With Morals I Like Men Who Have Intelligence I Like Men Who Dont Try To Change Me I Like Men Who Are Honest WHAT I DON"T LIKE: Wow!! Do You Have Enough Time For This??? OK HERE IT GOES…… When it Comes To Men If Your Conceided…Mouthy… Self Centered…Gold Digger…Arrogant… Liars…Ignorant…Overly Shy…Retards…..Players..Fake People……Morons…..Ghetto….Stuck Up People…Quacks…...People Who Don't Keep Their Word…..Anti-Social….Snappy….People Telling Me What I Can Do & What I Can't….Stupity… Games….Know-It-Alls…..Lazyness….Cheaters…People That Treat Me Like Shit….Men Who Chase Women Who Screw Anything And Everything That Moves, Wiggles, Or Even Resembles A Chik Doesnt Matter Wha Kinda Human, Animal, Plastic, Metal, Wood, Or Plant….Guys who screw Chics That Have A Three Ring Circus Of STD's…..etc … If Your ANY Of These Then Don't Even Bother Because I Don't Have Time For You!!!! About me: Throwin' some verbs up in here..... Restless, creative and imaginative, anti-dramatic, hopeless romantic, brown hair, blue eyed, silly, fun, sensitive, loving, non-gullible, non-ditzy, and most certain? somewhere out in left field. Always eager to please those that I love.♥ I completely believe in fate, and I always have faith .... if you don't have faith? You don't have anything of true value. Rude, condescending and amoralistic people suck. To those in an unsavory mood for whatever reason? I will continue to kill you with kindness and hope and pray its makes your day and hope you may pass it on. Because what goes around comes around, and I just may see you again. Karma is a bitch, I live by and believe firmy in that rule......... "Things" are bound to improve. When I am at home?. I try to practice focusing on what holds me together.... not what separates me. I tend deflect pain and hard times in my life with humor and attempt to not sweat the small stuff. I am so far from always being right, even farther from being perfect... to that ? I will admit Apparently? I am just a beautifully imperfect mess ♥ I'm a mom 2 three as well as a motorcyclist! LOL So In closing? I have a rep that renders me cynical, witty, and undoubtedly goofy... Hello :-) My name is ♥Juli£♥ . I won't call you if you give me your number if I don't know you, I will NOT cam with you, I will not send you X rated photos. I have loved and lost, I have smiled and cried, been hurt and been the one thats done the hurting, its called life. Maybe ... the brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; after all, you can't go on successfully in life until you let go of your past mistakes, failures, and heartaches. The not so right ones in my life will fade into the memories of my past and make way for the one i'm meant to find. The best relationship is based on friendship, so lets start there. The rest if its meant to be will follow suit. If this is appealing to you...then drop me a line. If you don't agree with what i'd say, then you're not someone i'd waste my time on anyway. In my free time I enjoy doing stunts, hanging with friends around a campfire on the beach and watching my kids smiles grow bigger with each new day and activity. I dont have time to be boggled down with trash in my life. I'll help anyone and everyone because i'm whats known as a "fixer", will try to fix problems you might have, but I recently realized thats its a two way street.
Ok, I seem to be getting bunches of drunk dialin calls..now i've been as guilty as the next (Sry Sean) but I found this, who the hell knew there were rules on this!!!! Finally, someone put it writing!!! (Try to read this when your sober, then come back to it when your drunk so you remember what you read!) 1. Only drunk dial when you are drunk. Everything else is false advertisement. 2. It is okay to call someone 27 times in one night. If you dont remember it, it didnt happen. 3. If you are going to drunk dial a family member, say something nice. Ex. “Mom Im in McDonalds & theyre playing our song. I love you” 4. Dirty talk while drunk dialing is always preferred. Who doesnt want to hear your best raspy, phone sex voice at 3 in the A.M. asking to bend them over something. 5. Voicemails are always better. This way your friend can let their friends have fun at your expense for days, even weeks to come. 6. Drunk texting is alright… if you are prepared to read what you wrote the next day when you are sober. 7. It is definitely a good idea to call all of your exs & remind them that you were the best lover theyve ever had & everything they know, they learned from u. This way you can sleep well at night. 8. you can also call this same ex & let them know, that you know, that they still love you. Then explain to that you understand because you would still love you too! 9. If you are a frequent dialer, never get mad if someone dials u. Be happy they thought of you in this special time. 10. It is always a good idea to sing on someones answering machine or voicemail. Especially a show tune. 11. Drunk dialing should be fun & light hearted or dirty and sex crazed… Never angry. 12. Most likely you will never drunk dial your best friends. They are usually the ones taking your phone away & reminding you that “u have a problem”. 13. If you deleted a number sober, it was probably for a good reason. Do not try to retrieve this number. Nothing good can come from it. 14. Always call someone you know. Finding random numbers in phone books is bad & usually leads to angry dialing. 15. If your cell phone dies, remember everything happens for a reason. Never borrow a friends phone to do your dialing. 16. Drunk dialing to foreign country is usually to costly to be a good idea. But if feel like if you dont call this person ull just die, break rule 15 & use a friends phone. 17. Drunk dialing may lead to drunk muffin stuffing… be prepared. 18. When drunk dialing remember that “hanging out” at 3 in the A.M. usually doesnt involve cards its probably going to be more like cheap lube & handcuffs. So be prepared when you really do want to play X-box when your drunk….. “u want me to do what with your box? Play with it?” 19. Dont drunk dial in the pool, tub, or rainstorm. It only ends up with you blow drying your phone when your far to drunk to be using electronics & you wont be able to drunk dial anymore that night. 20. Never, I repeat, never drunk dial your boss, preacher, grandpa, or friends parents. If you are that hard up to call someone, there is an 800 number on Budweiser boxes. The person on the other line always sounds cute, plus I think they are used to drunk dialers And those are the rules of drunk dialing! Enjoy!!!!
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