Today, law enforcement officials have announced the arrest of “Jimmy The Turtle,” the crime fighting tortoise who helped authorities lead them to the arrest of a 19 year-old who was caught with 10 pot plants last Wednesday.
“Yes, it disappointed us and the community when we learned that “Jimmy” was caught smoking pot and drinking beer at a park in Maryland with some other losers”, said Park Ranger Louis Canseda, a spokesperson for Parks and Recreation.
When asked by local reporters how “Jimmy” felt about his arrest, he said, “Hey what’s the big deal, I’m just your average turtle that likes to get high, and have a Budweiser every hour or so.”
“Jimmy The T will be mandated to do 30 hours of community service, and is court ordered to attend 18 AA meetings.
According to authorities, this is “Jimmy’s” 3rd alcohol and drug related offense.
