Pedro El Awesomeo needs Bombs's blog: "Encephalon"

I am in the process of cleaning up my Yahoo Messenger list (remember when it used to be Yahoo! Pager, man I feel old sometimes.)  Typically what I do is before I clean out any names, I move them into a separate group as a “holding area” for inactivity for an indeterminate amount of time, then if I don’t speak with them, they get purged on my next clean up.  I send out a mass communication announcing my intent, and asking if the people still have me on their list, to go ahead and delete me, if I am not on their list anymore; then please go about your merry way.  If you are reading this blog, odds are you probably didn’t get the announcement, as it really is for people that I don’t talk to.  It’s not that I do not like the people that I am removing, because really I do, I just don’t see the need to have someone on a communications device if I am not in fact communicating with them anymore.  Some people see this as a personal insult, and truly its not.  I get some replies with thinly veiled hostility, or others asking just “why?”  I am really not trying to be rude, and it is not a ploy to gather anyone’s attention.  The ones that really make me scratch my head are the requests to add me to their list, in my brain, I am like, to you I was already gone, without the courtesy I am extending to you, and now when I try to do the same, you want to be friends?  I pointed this out to someone and they told me “I didn’t think you were on anymore.”  To which I wanted to respond; “Don’t BS me; I am not even on your list.”  I also have a small feeling of “the road goes both ways” I never fail to reply to any message I receive, so if you feel like I am not talking to you, then you need to do a little introspection as to just how often you are talking with me.   

The best real life example I can think of is this soccer team I used to play on.  We had practices two nights a week and games once on the weekend.  I used to spend hours with these people, and we would hang and go to a bar after games or etc.  When I stopped playing, I really stopped interacting with them.  It wasn’t that I didn’t like them anymore, but the time I freed up when I wasn’t playing was still the time they were busy, so the schedules just didn’t work out.  I’d see them around from time to time, and we’d talk for a bit, but really there was no longer the connection of a shared purpose and we both had to be on our ways. 

It could be the military in me, you work with people, and you spend lots of time with them, then eventually, one of you is going to be reassigned and stationed somewhere or even get out of the service altogether.  For the people that have moved on, some you’ll see again at another duty station, some you won’t.  It’s not something you can control, and as much as you may try to stay connected, it just doesn’t work.  If you view life in a larger scale, sometimes your orbits interact with other people, and sometimes people fall out.  Those same people may end up back in your orbit again, and you can build off your previous times and form an even stronger relationship.  Maybe I can’t even blame it on the military, maybe it’s just a pillar of my philosophy that I would rather take joy in what I have rather than mourn what I have lost. 

I’ll end on a public service announcement, if we ever part, please know now that it’s no statement on you or our friendship, and I honestly enjoy our interactions, it was just time to part ways, it's nothing personal, just good bye.