illbgood2u's blog: "Is It Me?"

I'm in my room, alone, wondering where my guy is, does he know I'm waiting for him?... Why is he taking so long to come to me, doesn't he know that I'm the one whose going to make him so happy, that I'm that girl who can make all his dreams come true... That every step I take, every breath I breathe, I take thinking of him... Doesn't he know by now that I'll stand by him thru thick and thin... That when he's sad, I can cheer him up, I will make him feel like the KING he deserves to be... No one deserves to be so alone, so lonely... Just 1 man to do a thousand things with.... Always Me

The way the sweetness pures off of him, onto to me.... The way he uses his words, whispers in my ear... Goose bumps rising all over my body.. Did he know that I needed this particular medicine? That for so long I have not been able to obtain it... My body, my mind needing it... When finally that day came, when I recieved the first dose, it was as if I was on a natural high... WOW what a feeling... Everytime he makes me laugh the way my eyes turn chinky... My face turning red.... The laughter building deep inside, the most beautiful music releasing from my heart... The realness in it... How can I explain that feeling? What he does to me, is take my breathe away....

Isn't Valentine's Day suppose to be the day that someone you care about, someone that you spend time with, someone that means a little something to you, not just someone you love.... I mean yesterday was the day that I truly knew in my heart that he'd come by and spend some time with me. Like he has in the past.... Not a gift, not a bouguet of flowers, not even a one.. Hey would you believe not even a call.. Wow and to think, I thought I meant something to him.... Was it me? Wasn't I nice with him... Didnt I give him attention... Wasn't I a good friend.. You see this would have been my 1st Valentine's Day in 6 years...So I wont lie to you.. I cried, yes I cried like baby..... Can anyone plz tell me WHY ! ! !

Sometimes I wonder, is it me? Can I be so gullable, At 43 Am I not suppose to see the bullshit that comes out of men's mouth.. Do they all get together and create the same old lines? They say one thing before they get in your pants, then the words change... Im looking for a woman who wont take me for granted..... Id like to meet and be with just 1 lady who knows what she wants.... Then you spend a hot steamy night with this guy.... Then the words change to this.... I thought this was what I wanted... I just got out of a relationship, Im moving too fast... Why can't they just say.... Im in a relationship, its not going so hot... she stopped giving me "blow-jobs", Havent had sex in over 3 months... Would love to meet a lady who needs a good friend, and good sex... This way we have a choose, if I want a hot steamy night with this guy, Id say HELL YEAH... So come on guys keep it REAL Thats what a REAL man is about....