wimsey's blog: "Informational"

Creating a Skin Note: Photobucket is doing something weird that causes backgrounds uploaded there recently to not work in a new skin (existing skins seem to work just fine). Try using ImageShack or another host instead. These are instructions for creating a CherryTap skin. These aren’t for an advanced user (they probably don’t need ‘em :), but I’d advise that you be reasonably computer-knowledgeable before trying to use them. These instructions assume you know how to do things like pick colors on a chart, copy and paste, etc., can follow basic computer documentation, and aren’t intimidated by monkeying with code. Keep in mind that skins, as well as music videos, music, graphics, etc. WILL SLOW DOWN YOUR PAGE. So, you may want to pick and choose what you want to clutter your page with. Personally, I have a skin, and music that’s there but is not automatically played upon page load. I avoid lots of graphics because I generally find them annoying clutter on other people’s pages.

1. Pick out a background. You can search on "flower backgrounds" or whatever on Google. A good place to start is About.com's Backgrounds. Look for a tile image, not a single image or a border. CherryTap pages work best with a tiled image. Normally a site will show you an example of what it looks like tiled, but if not, you can test it out on your background. Ask me if you don’t know how. If you do want to use a single image, resize it to be about 870 x 648 and note that in a typical screen resolution, the image won't go all the way to the right and the top and bottom will be cut off.
2. Right-click on the background tile you want and choose Properties. (Or, better yet, right-click and Save As the image, then upload it to a site like ImageShack. Avoid Photobucket for the time being.)
3. Copy everything in the Address/URL field.
4. Go to the CherryTap Tools website.
5. Paste the Address/URL into the Background Image URL field. Be sure to clear the field first.
6. Above that, for the Background Color field, click on the color wheel to choose a compatible color from the color chart in case your background doesn’t load. You may have to scroll over to see the entire color chart.
7. Under All Boxes, click the color wheel to choose a Background Color for all of the text boxes on your CherryTap page. (This color will be the background color for everything from the About Me/Video Games/Movies/Music boxes to your Friends list box.) This will not affect your Alerts box, shout box, Cherry blasts, or stash.
8. Click the color wheel for the Border Color to choose a color for the border around your boxes.
9. Under All Links, click the color wheel for the Font Color to choose a color for the text of all links.
   On CherryTap, these will be your user control links (add as friend, etc), blog post names, etc. (all of the left side, basically) AS WELL AS linked text in your alert box. So you MUST choose a color that will show up against both your box color AND against the default black that you get for your alerts box. Usually something on the light to medium side of the spectrum works best. So keep this in mind when choosing your box colors.
10. Under All Box Text, click the color wheel for the Font Color to choose a color for all the text in your About Me, Movies, Music, etc. boxes.
    Keep in mind, this color has to show up well against your box color. So if your box color is dark, go light with the font color. If your box color is light, go with a darker font.
11. Leave all other settings at default, to start with. You can monkey with these if you feel the need. I never do.
12. Click Generate.
    The site generates a bunch of code in a box.
13. Copy the generated code. DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM AND PASTE IT INTO “ABOUT ME.” That doesn’t work.

Meanwhile, over on CherryTap:

1. On the left side of your home page, click my skins.
   CherryTap displays a listing of all of your skins.
2. On the Skins page, click create skin. CherryTap displays a skin creation page.
3. Enter a name for the skin in the Name field.
4. Select all text in the large box and delete it (DON’T CUT, just delete… you want the stuff you have copied to stay on your clipboard).
5. Click on the box and paste the generated code from CherryTap Tools.
6. Scroll back up to the top of the generated code. You will see a section that looks like this:

body { background-color: #1E66B4; background-position: center top; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-attachment: fixed; background-image:url("http://i74.photobucket.com/albums/i250/wimsey70/flower_11.gif"); }

If your background is a tile, remove the line that says "background-repeat: no-repeat;" Be careful not to remove anything else.
This line was created automatically by the layout generator, but we don’t want it; we want our background to tile (repeat). If you are using a single image for your background, skip this step. If your background isn't a tile, you may want to change "center top" to read "center left." Click save skin. In the Skins listing, click preview skin for the skin you just created. You’ll get a new window (or tab) with your home page displaying the new skin. Enable the skin by choosing YES from the pulldown menu under active. Voila! You’re done. Please don’t hesitate to ask me if you have any questions. I don’t have a lot of time for hand-holding, but I can help if you can’t figure out what I’m talking about. Debugging Problems If your background doesn’t load, but your color scheme seems correct, CherryTap may have stupidly put in some slashes around your background image name when your skin saved. I don’t know why it does it, but it means that then the link is wrong. If this happens (and it doesn’t, always), you must click edit skin and repeat steps 4-9 (2nd half) until your background actually loads. Also, if you are using Photobucket, try another site (like Imageshack). There seems to be something weird going on with CherryTap accessing background images on Photobucket. If your skin doesn't seem correct at all (incorrect color scheme), go back in and check. Sometimes CherryTap overwrites your skin code with something that looks like the following:

address { } applet { } area { } a { text-decoration: underline; color: #faccce;

If that's the case, select all text in the box, delete it, then re-paste the skin code and save again. It usually works the second time.

Hey, I'm reposting this. A few of you saw it in December, and to you I apologize that you're seeing it again. But I have a lot of new friends, plus I reposted NSFW pics, so I thought it apropos to repost. So, as time goes on, I become increasingly annoyed by certain things online. Believe it or not, I started out on this whole online adventure very optimistic, friendly, and patient, but that has eroded with time and treatment. If you don't believe me, ask to see my chronicle of stupid, offensive, and horrific behavior I experienced in a few short weeks online (after that, I stopped keeping track 'cuz it got too depressing). As a result, I've come up with what I'm starting to think of, not as *rules*, exactly, but more as guidelines for dealing with me. If these sound overly harsh, it's because these are things I run into time and time again. Don't take them personally. If you're actually reading this blog, they probably mostly don't apply to you. And if they don't apply, then don't get annoyed on behalf of the assholes out there. They're the ones ruining it for the rest of you. Blame them, not the women reacting to their ill treatment. Physical Appearance If someone finds me attractive, that's great. That said, I am more than a pic. Hell, I'm a lot more than just my NSFW pics, let alone my pics in general. So READ MY PROFILE! I'm serious about this. My self-image is not based on my appearance, but rather on my personality, intellect, etc., and if you treat me as if those things are unimportant, I won't like you. And especially read the damn thing if you're about to talk to me. I answer such basic questions as "where are you?" "are you single?" "what do you do" IN MY PROFILE. Look, I know we all read a lot of profiles. People start to blur into one another. But before you shout at me, or IM me, please review my profile so you don't sound like an idiot. 'cuz I will think you're an idiot if you're asking me questions that are answered at the very top of my profile. Speaking of NSFW Photos I take my NSFW photos for me. For me, myself, and I. If you like them, that's a side benefit, not my goal. I reveal as little or as much as I want to reveal. If you have complaints about what I don't show, much of the internet is porn -- go out and explore. I won't hold it against you. Just don't complain to me, because I will A) not care, and B) think you're an asshole. No, I will not post full nudes. Because I don't want to. And no, I will never EVER post cunt and tit photos. I don't care if you want them. They aren't my style. I repeat: much of the internet is porn. Go look at someone else. If you can't appreciate the sexiness of the images I choose to show, you aren't worthy of them. Also, yup, I have NSFW photos. I also have tons of other images posted. Photos I've taken, family photos, art I like, humor I appreciate. I also (obviously) have a long blog full of stuff about me. I'm a sharer. And almost all of what I choose to share is not about my sex life. Sure, some is. My sexuality is a part of who I am -- a part I embrace and enjoy. But it's nowhere near all of who I am. And I despair of those people who choose to view me, and treat me, as a whore because 25 of my 110 photos are NSFW. Oh, and if I don't really know you, I don't really care if you get off to my pics. So, please, don't share. Well, what about MY NSFW photos? Nope, I won't rate and comment your NSFW photos. You won't get points, and my comments will be stupid. I ran out of creative things to say about penises about 100 penises ago. And if you are a stranger to me, I won't care about your NSFW photos. For multiple reasons. First of all, your pride and joy... I know it's special to you. I know you love, cosset, and enjoy it. But to me... it's a penis. It looks exactly like every other penis. Maybe the size is different. Maybe it's slightly curved, or a different color. But generally, it looks the same. Not only that, but you probably took your photos from exactly the same angle and distance, with exactly the same overexposure from the flash, as the last nine guys who asked me. Plus, you're a stranger to me. And I do not get attracted visually. I might have some small physical reaction, but I'm a girl, and generally (and I'm generalizing here) women don't care about the physical reactions as much as the emotional and intellectual ones. And quite frankly, I don't care 'til I know you and am attracted to you. Even then, I will probably really only care about your cock when it's in person, and we're naked, and I'm about to get lucky. Before then? Really doesn't help me, now, does it? Write me some erotica. That'll do it. Visual odes to your pride and joy? Won't. Or, here's a tip (and this isn't just me... I've seen a lot of mums on this topic as well): if you want to share NSFW pics of yourself, take full body shots. Or tease us -- give us open shirt, unzipped pants, and the suggestion of your bulge... maybe give us the arrow of joy leading to your pants, but only a glimpse of said joy. Or, give us face, chest, and groin area when you're turned on... and look turned on. We'll mostly be looking at your face. Speaking of sex... No, I don't really want to talk about sex with you. Wanna know why? You are the 4th guy to start talking about sex with me in the last hour, and the 37 millionth in the last year. I'm a woman on the internet, and you are boring me. I'm an intelligent, interesting woman who can discourse on a wide variety of topics. And you are a stranger to me. I'm not attracted to you. I don't care if you're hot -- I'm still not attracted to you because that's not how I work. I'm attracted to people after we've conversed, gotten to know one another, and developed a wonderful conversational and intellectual vibe. Then you can ask me about sex all you want. 'til then, I'm not attracted to you, and talking about sex with you will bore me. How to talk to me Before you say anything to someone through the internet, imagine you just met this person at a party, or through a mutual friend. And think, "how would I go about getting to know this person?" For example, the first words out of your mouth should probably not be, "ur so hot. id fuck ya." In real life, that would get you slapped in a lot of cases. So why do it here? We're still people. And no, I'm not taking the internet too seriously. If you can't figure out that there are real people at the end of every conversation, and that talking to that person like the above example is rude... well, I despair. I have nothing else to say. Getting back to profiles... Why does your profile have nothing in it? Or, worse yet, the dreaded statement, "ask me?" Do you really have that little to say about yourself? If pressed, couldn't you come up with a personality description, what you do for a living, your interests, likes and dislikes? Then why don't you? So that I have someplace to start with conversation when you start talking to me? Because, no, I don't want to ask you those questions, because I had to ask the last ten guys, and I'm annoyed with it by now. We all know why you haven't filled out your profile... you didn't feel like it. You're too lazy to do so. Well, here's a good reason to do so. Women who've been around a bit are annoyed by empty profiles. And I'm seriously at the point where I'm going to start denying add requests from people who can't bother to fill out some basic information about themselves. I'm not even gettin' into the people who can't seem to post photos of themselves. How lame is that? A few other things Contests: I think contests are annoying and stupid, and just end up being popularity contests more than anything else. They're all about who can guilt-trip the most friends into voting for them. If forced by guilt to go vote, I may not vote for you. I will vote for whomever I think deserves it. So don't ask me to vote in contests. You won't necessarily like the results. And you will annoy me. Bulletins: If your bulletin threatens to drop me if I don't read it, I won't read it. Simple as that. Most of the bulletins that make those threats are alerts or whatnot, and I've already seen 10 of them, which means most people have already seen them, and my reposting them is just going to annoy all of the rest of my friends and fans. Honestly, I read bulletins that look personal, and that's it. If you're pimping someone, and I'm bored, I may go be a good pal and rate/comment that person, but in all likelihood I have enough trouble keeping up with my own friends and don't have time for more. Photo Updates and Blog: I WANT so desperately to be a good friend and keep up with your photos and blogs. And I really do try. But unless I devote about 50% of my day to CherryTap, I can't. So if we're really good friends, and you really want me to see your new photos or a blog entry, point it out to me. Drop me a message or a comment, and I'll take a look. I will want to! To sum up I love CherryTap. I love meeting new people. I'm excited every time a new person starts talking with me, and when a really great conversation gets going, I am overjoyed. I love people, and making relationships -- they're really the joy in my life. But there's so much other shit getting in the way of that. *grumble* So, thank you very much for reading my venting/ranting. Although I doubt most of you made it through this whole thing. Hopefully, someone at least learned something

Mistakes Men Make During Sex (C'mon, you know you wanted to know. Plus, this is funny as hell.) 1) GOING RIGHT FOR THE "GOOD STUFF" Avoiding her lips and diving straight for the erogenous zones makes her feel like you're paying by the hour and trying to get your money's worth by cutting out nonessentials. A proper passionate kiss is the ultimate form of foreplay. 2) BLOWING TOO HARD IN HER EAR. Admit it, some kid at school told you girls love this. Well, there's a difference between being erotic and blowing as if you're trying to extinguish the candles on your 50th birthday cake. That hurts. 3) NOT SHAVING. You often forget you have a porcupine strapped to our chin which you rake repeatedly across your partner's face and thighs. When she turns her head from side to side, it's not passion, it's avoidance. 4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST. Most men act like a housewife testing a melon for ripeness when they get their hand on a pair. Stroke, caress, and smooth them. 5) BITING HER NIPPLES. Why do men fasten onto a woman's nipples, then clamp down like they're trying to deflate her body via her breasts? Nipples are highly sensitive. They can't stand up to chewing. Lick and suck them gently. Flicking your tongue across them is good and a little nibbling is a turn on but pretending they're a dogie toy isn't. 6) TWIDDLING HER NIPPLES. Stop doing that thing where you twiddle the nipples between finger and thumb like you're trying to find a radio station in a hilly area. Focus on the whole breasts, not just the exclamation points. 7) IGNORING THE OTHER PARTS OF HER BODY. A woman is not a highway with just three turnoffs: Breastville East and West, and the Midtown Tunnel. There are vast areas of her body which you've ignored far too often as you go bombing straight into downtown Vagina. So start paying them some attention. 8) GETTING THE HAND TRAPPED. Poor manual dexterity in the underskirt region can result in tangled fingers and underpants. If you're going to be that aggressive, just ask her to take the damn things off. 9) LEAVING HER A LITTLE PRESENT. Condom disposal is your responsibility. You wore it, you store it. 10) ATTACKING THE CLITORIS. Direct pressure is very unpleasant, so gently rotate your fingers along side of the clitoris. 11) STOPPING FOR A BREAK. Women, unlike men, don't pick up where they left off. If you stop, they plummet back to square one very fast. If you can tell she's not there, keep going at all costs, numb jaw or not. 12) UNDRESSING HER AWKWARDLY. Women hate looking stupid, but stupid she will look when naked at the waist with a sweater stuck over her head. Unwrap her like an elegant present, not a kid's toy. 13) GIVING HER A WEDGIE DURING FOREPLAY. Stroking her gently through her panties can be very sexy. Pulling the material up between her thighs and yanking it back and forth is not. 14) BEING OBSESSED WITH THE VAGINA. Although most men can find the clitoris without maps, they still believe that the vagina is where it's all at. No sooner is your hand down there than you're trying to stuff stolen banknotes up a chimney. This is okay in principle, but if you're not careful, it can hurt - so don't get carried away. It's best to pay more attention to her clitoris and the exterior of her vagina at first, then gently slip a finger inside her and see if she likes it. 15) MASSAGING TOO ROUGHLY. You're attempting to give her a sensual, relaxing massage to get her in the mood. Hands and fingertips are okay; elbows and knees are not. 16) UNDRESSING PREMATURELY. Don't force the issue by stripping before she's at least made some move toward getting your stuff off, even if it's just undoing a couple of buttons. 17) TAKING YOUR PANTS OFF FIRST. Wearing socks and underpants is the worst. Lose the socks at least... fast. 18) GOING TOO FAST. When you get to the penis-in-vagina situation, the worst thing you can do is pump away like an industrial power tool - she'll soon feel like an assembly-line worker made obsolete by your technology. Build up slowly, with clean, straight, regular thrusts. 19) GOING TOO HARD. If you bash your great triangular hip bones into her thigh or stomach, the pain is equal to two weeks of horseback riding concentrated into a few seconds. 20) COMING TOO SOON. Every man's fear. With reason. If you shoot before you see the whites of her eyes, make sure you have a backup plan to ensure her pleasure too. 21) NOT COMING SOON ENOUGH. It may appear to you that humping for an hour without climaxing is the mark of a sex god, but to her it's more likely the mark of a numb vagina. At least buy some intriguing wall hangings, so she has something to hold her interest while you're playing Marathon Man. 22) ASKING IF SHE HAS COME. You really ought to be able to tell. Most women make noise. But if you really don't know, don't ask. 23) PERFORMING ORAL SEX TOO GENTLY. Don't act like a giant cat at a saucer of milk. Get your whole mouth down there, and concentrate on gently rotating or flicking your tongue on her clitoris. 24) NUDGING HER HEAD DOWN. We persist in doing this until she's eyeball-to-penis, hoping that it will lead very swiftly to mouth-to-penis. All women hate this. It's about three steps from being dragged to a cave by their hair. If you want her to use her mouth, use yours; try talking seductively to her. 25) NOT SHAVING PT.2 We seem to like women to be shaved or trimmed down below. That's fine. But women like that too. That doesn't mean you have to shave it bare (although, that would be nice), but at least keep it neat and trimmed. There's nothing that turns a girl off more than looking at a penis sticking out of a forest. 26) NOT WARNING HER BEFORE YOU CLIMAX. Sperm basically tastes like sea water mixed with egg white. Not everybody likes it. When she's performing oral sex, warn her before you come so she can do what's necessary. 27) MOVING AROUND DURING FELLATIO. Don't thrust. She'll do all the moving during fellatio. You just lie there. And don't grab her head. 28) TAKING ETIQUETTE ADVICE FROM PORN MOVIES. In X-rated movies, women seem to love it when men ejaculate over them. In real life, it just means more laundry to do. 29) MAKING HER RIDE ON TOP FOR AGES. Asking her to be on top is fine. Lying there grunting while she does all the hard work is not. Caress her gently, so that she doesn't feel quite so much like the captain of a schooner. And let her have a rest. 30) ATTEMPTING ANAL SEX AND PRETENDING IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. (Pointed stare at *SOMEONE*) This is how men earn a reputation for not being able to follow directions. If you want to put it there, ask her first. And don't think that being drunk is an excuse. 31) TAKING PICTURES. When we say, "Can I take a photo of you?" she'll hear the words "__to show my buddies." At least let her have custody of them. 32) NOT BEING IMAGINATIVE ENOUGH. Imagination is anything from drawing patterns on her back to pouring honey on her and licking it off. Fruit, vegetables, ice and feathers are all handy props; hot candle wax and permanent dye are a no no. 33) SLAPPING YOUR STOMACH AGAINST HERS. There is no less erotic noise. It's as sexy as a belching contest. 34) ARRANGING HER IN STUPID POSES. If she wants to do advanced yoga in bed, fine, but unless she's a Romanian gymnast, don't get too ambitious. Ask yourself if you want a sexual partner with snapped hamstrings. 35) LOOKING FOR HER PROSTATE. Read this carefully: Anal stimulation feels good for men because we have a prostate. Women don't. 36) GIVING LOVE BITES. It is highly erotic to exert some gentle suction on the sides of the neck, if you do it carefully. No woman wants to have to wear turtlenecks and jaunty scarves for weeks on end. 37) BARKING INSTRUCTIONS. Don't shout encouragement like a coach with a megaphone. It's not a big turn-on. 38) TALKING DIRTY. It makes you sound like a lonely magazine editor calling a 1-900 line. If she likes nasty talk, she'll let you know. 39) NOT CARING WHETHER SHE COMES. You have to finish the job. Keep on trying until you get it right, and she might even do the same for you. 40) SQUASHING HER. We generally weigh more than women, so if you lie on her a bit too heavily, she will turn blue. 41) THANKING HER. Never thank a woman for having sex with you. Your bedroom is not a soup kitchen. BTW, I didn't write this. I wish I had, but I didn't. :)

Grr... I'm a person renowned for remembering birthdays. I'm serious -- I keep track of ALL of my real life friends' and family's birthdays and always drop them a line on their birthday. But it's too hard to keep track on CherryTap! (At least Myspace gives me upcoming birthday warnings, as long as I pay attention to them.) And it just took me a half-hour to go through just my family and a few select friends and write down their birthdays. It would take me hours and hours to go through 500 friends' pages. :( So, if you want love on your birthday, drop me a line, especially if your birthday is in the next couple months. Right now, I have, written down: Wendi/Angelkisses 1/16 Stangme 2/4 Lindale 2/23 Talkietoasta 2/26 Speedball 3/11 Amazon 3/16 Poopsiekinz 3/18 Bilicious 3/26 Will/TexanMarine 4/12 Ringling 4/12 Joecub 4/14 Anyone else in those months, please let me know, and I'll be sure to leave you some birthday love!