ElisARoX's blog: "rants over humanity."

Ive givin up
ive fallen out
ive lost all that ive lacked
i cant turn around
i cant change the past
i cant let you go
i cant stay behind.
((im a weak ass bitch.))

This is far from a love story.
This is far from a horror story.
This is the current stance... the current situation
OF karma biting my ASS.

Im tired.
im sick and tired of being that girl who wears her heart on her sleeve
Only to get it shattered and broken and beat and fucked up.
But, its not your fault...
No, It is Not your fault...
I did this to myself.

Im laying here asking myself.
I did many things wrong.
that i can recall
Ive gotton irratated.
Situations have changed.
Things, went into a downward spiral.
But.
......

You said you wanted to treat me right.
Why did you give up the fight.
You say you can't give me what i need.

All i needed was a friend.
Your shoulder to cry on.
Your hands to hold.
Your strength when i am weak.
Someone to look me in the eyes and say
ITS. GOING. TO. BE. OKAY.
Without feeding me a line of bullshit....


I hesitated so much on going to see you....
Months and MONTHS went by and i finally went up there....
1000 at night i got in my SUV and drove...
Just so i could finally touch you for the first time.


-(August 7th. 2009.)-
it was a night worth remembering....

And you grew on me
More than i wanted you to.
I just dont get it.
Why do i set myself up to get hurt again?
Why am i so suseptable to this kind of thing?
Why dont i just move on?
Because...

I cant.

But. you are you.
enough said.

And im not going to sit here and fight.

Until then..