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RayvensHope's blog: "my ramblings"

created on 11/08/2007  |  http://fubar.com/my-ramblings/b151912

im just f#@&%*d up

where is my life going? i wish i knew i thought i did then he walked away for someone new i thought i was happy and content but i know see i wasnt why cant i just get over it? why is it taking this long? why cant i find someone else to prove to me he was wrong? am i that useless? am i that bad? am i that ugly? what did i do wrong? why do i have to feel so unworthy? why does it have to hurt this way? would anyone even notice if i was gone? would anyone care? would you notice if i was no longer here? you dont know me i dont know myself anymore my medications work to make me seem happy but i dont think i really am dont tell me im wrong dont tell me itll be ok let me have my thoughts my doubts words mean nothing actions mean everything i hear the words people say but their actions tell me differently which am i to believe? words or actions? actions speak louder than words but words you know what they mean actions can be deceiving id rather be hated for who i am than to be loved for who im not
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