I have learned many lessons in my life. It seems as if those lessons where hard earned. Some of those lessons were self-taught by the countless mistakes I have made through my life. Some lessons were taught by those who loved me and guided me. Some lessons were even imparted on me by those who would have just as soon seen me destroyed in one way or another. To all of this I am grateful.
I have learned that depression is when the heart hurts but despair is when the soul hurts. I have learned that nothing stays bad forever, things get better or they pass. I have learned that you cannot worry about the things you cannot change and you do not need to worry about the things you can. I have learned that you do not have to let things happen to you but you can make things happen. I have learned that a person is not who they say they are but who they show they are. I have learned all of this and more and I am thankful.
I am most thankful for all the people that are in my life and the ones that have brushed by it. They have all left their mark. The ones that hurt me and left me in the pit of despair and the ones that were there to try to lift me up. The ones that have forgiven me and the ones that feel I have wronged them so much that they will be angry with me for eternity. All of these people have shaped me into the person I have become. For good or ill I am who I am, I do not think I would rather be anyone else. I have learned, and taken a little, from every relationship I have encountered. I have learned from friends, family, passionate loves, failed relationships and even enemies. I appreciate them all. There is no time for hate.
I do not regret the things I have done or said. The mistakes I have made I have learned from. I regret the mistakes I did not make. I regret the things never tried and the words never spoken. I regret the times I have never told a person I love them because I feared rejection and the fact that my silence probably seemed like I was rejecting them. I regret all the times I chewed on my emotions and swallowed them never letting a soul know they were there. So many things I could have accomplished and so much happiness that was missed, all because of fear. To do it over again I would speak more and do more. I would let my actions and words catch up with my thoughts. At least there is time.
It has been a long journey of self-discovery for me and the journey is not yet over. I dare say it has just begun. I hope your journey also continues and amazes you along the way. May you learn form your mistakes and may the wind stay at your back.
Lee O. Easter, III
