America, I am sick of recovering. What I find amazing, is that, even though I had major surgery...nobody really cares anymore.
Don't get me wrong. The friends I have online check up on me every day. They see how I'm feeling, making sure I'm walking and taking care of my diet (high blood sugar), and making me feel good about myself.
But the people around me physically, don't really give a shit. I mean they do, but for as much as they're around me...you'd think they could do a little more.
Nobody visits. My one friend was on vacation my first week, and he was over almost every day. It was great, and I'm very appreciative of it. The drunken neighbor even stopped by, and lent me "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" seasons.
But since then, nobody. My friend went back to work (he travels), and I'm stuck home all day with my wife, who hogs the TV, and so I get stuck watching old, crappy sitcoms. The boy comes home, says hi, and buries himself in his room.
I get up early, so I make my own breakfast. By the time she wakes up, has her coffee, about a third of the time, I get lunch made by her. I have some issues with blood sugar, so I've really watched what I'm eating, but I am sick of whole grain, cardboard tasting bread. I tell he this, and she says its healthier for me, so thats what we're getting from now on.
Which means I have been skipping lunch, or eating cereal every day for my first two meals. Or sometimes I mix it up with oatmeal one meal, and cereal the next.
Somehow in the last three weeks, everything has turned to sugar free in the house, or diet, so it isn't even worth snacking. My metabolism is so low right now, I don't want to drink water in fear of gaining weight.
I absolutely hate being home, it is like prison. I can't go back to work full time till after the snow is mostly over, because the boss' are afraid I'll stop in a hidden ditch or run, and fuck up my back again, so I'm stuck here til at least March 1st. Where is global warming when you need it most.
I thought this surgery would make everything better, but I am still absolutely miserable, and depressed, and wish I had a time machine.
I guess the good news is my wife now doesn't need surgery, so I don't have to worry about that. Now if she'd just go out and look for a job, so she'd quit nagging and leave me alone, that would be awesome.
So I get tasteless food, a warden looking over my shoulder as soon as she decides to wake up, and a bunch of "friends" who have forgotten about me mostly.
I hate my life
