tomarrow is not like any other day....
tomarrow is a sad day....
tomarrow is the day that my heart broke...
a break that will can never be repaired....
a hole that can never be filled....
a life that can never be replaced
God how i miss him...
this last year has been so hard...
anything can make me cry
i never thought that i would miss someone this much
i mean, we never got along when i was little...
we clashed, mom said it was cuz
we were so alike we were...
i look like him... i have his smile...
his toes... his hands... and somedays his eyes
my daddy is gone...
he went away....
its hard to think that i will never see him again
here anyways.... i know hes in heaven
and i will meet him there one day...
but i miss him now, i need him now..
i love my grandpa and my uncle dan...
but i want my daddy to walk me down
the isle next summer....
i want my dance to be with him...
i dont like having to do his jobs...
it makes me miss him more...
checking my oil...
mowing the lawn...
raking the leaves....
it all breaks my heart....
having to do those things isnt a big deal...
but those were his jobs... things he did with me
and for me... it makes me miss him even more...
i hate how i feel sometimes...
its been a year ...but i still cry myself to sleep
every now and then... i hear that song
on the radio and it breaks my heart
sometimes i have to pull over while im driving because
im crying so hard.... my mom can feel him..
my sister can feel him... i cant...
when i hear that song it makes me think hes
watching over me.... but i cant feel him...
i dreamt about him last night....
i just grabbed him and hugged him so tight
held on for dear life... looked into
those blue eyes... and jsut wanted to make
a memory... i know i will never forget him...
but sometimes i cant remember what
he smelled like you know..
i got his bracelet a few weeks ago...
and one of the rings he was wearing
when he went... i wore them during my finals
and i did great... i got an A and 2 B's ...
i know hed be proud... but i wish
he was here to tell me...
when will it get easier...
i have his picture up all over my room
i look at him everyday....
but it doesnt help...
he had a picture of carlene and i
in his medicine cabinet so he could
look at us every morining after we
moved into our dorms....
i still cant help but think...
what if i had grabbed the wrong bottle
and gotten the asprin by mistake instead
of the non-asprin... and what is funny
is i was thinking... i should get asprin
it helps if your having a heart attack...
but then i just put it back...
i can still see him laying on the bed...
he looked like he was sleeping...
my mom says his eyes were open...
but they were closed...i swear they were closed...
Dear God give me strength...
