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s1l3nt's blog: "I Fuck"

created on 12/26/2008  |  http://fubar.com/i-fuck/b267905
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posted on 09/30/2013&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;12:09&nbs-07:00;pm

I don't believe you! Lyrics.. Been running through my head!!

I don't mind it, I don't mind at all
 It's like you're the swing set, and I'm the kid that falls
 It's like the way we fight, the times I've cried
 We come to blows but every night
 The passion's there, so it's got to be right, right?

No, I don't believe you
 When you say don't come around here no more
 I won't remind you
 You said we wouldn't be apart

No, I don't believe you
 When you say you don't need me anymore
 So don't pretend to
 Not love me at all

I don't mind it, I still don't mind at all
 It's like one of those bad dreams when you can't wake up
 Looks like you've given up, you've had enough
 But I want more, no, I wont' stop
 'Cause I just know you'll come around, right?

No, I don't believe you
 When you say don't come around here no more
 I won't remind you
 You said we wouldn't be apart

No, I don't believe you
 When you say you don't need me anymore
 So don't pretend to
 Not love me at all

Just don't stand there and watch me fall
 'Cause I, 'cause I still don't mind at all

It's like the way we fight, the times I've cried
 We come to blows and every night
 The passion's there
 So it's got to be right, right?

No, I don't believe you
 When you say don't come around here no more
 I won't remind you
 You said we wouldn't be apart

No, I don't believe you
 When you say you don't need me anymore
 So don't pretend to
 Not love me at all
 Oh, I don't believe

 

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posted on 08/18/2013&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;10:08&nbs-07:00;pm

Poem I wrote when I was 15..

Uhm wow! I was browsing my angelfire account and came across my poetry that I wrote when I was 15.. haha Just thought I would share one.. It was titled ~My Soul~ ,...    All day long I work for you, I never run out of things to do.  You push me to the very limit, Then I act as if you didn't.  I want to run and hide, But you keep me locked inside. I wish that I could disappear, But the wrath of my master is my greatest fear. I try to explain but you don't see, I want you to know you are killing me! Pain and torture that is all I endure, It's as if I'm being punished for comminting murder.  I wish that I was free, But then, I wouldn't be me...

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posted on 08/16/2013&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;03:08&nbs-07:00;pm

I have a thought.....

You have become my obsession. My desires have become infected with Your will to use me however You see fit. Thirstily I crave a touch from You that I have not yet felt. The thought of becoming a slave for You makes my body quiver. The pain that You will inflict on my body makes my skin crawl. You have not yet touched me, but I can imagine the firmness of Your hands. I beg for my punishment. I want to be bad for You, so that I can be seen as good in Your eyes. My body is transforming itself into Your possession. I'm feeling the addiction more each minute. The submission of my being is becoming easier to fathom. I'm ready to be trained. You have the control. You have the power to use me, and make me feel that release. Complete and total control of my body as I am not able to control myself. I await the day that I become Yours.

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posted on 12/26/2008&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;07:12&nbs-08:00;pm

Never

We will never be together. There will never be one sweet day. Sorry I never told you all I wanted to say. You know why it is so easy for me to type out my feelings? When you say the words outloud to someone, it can never be taken back. But when you write you can always hit the delete button and it’s as if you have never said anything at all. This is my way of never saying anything at all. Because in actuality, nine times out of ten, I will never open my mouth.
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posted on 12/26/2008&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;07:12&nbs-08:00;pm

Leaving

Keep talking fool. You are making it way easy for me to pack up. Keep running your game and see how easy it is for me to walk away For real If this is your purpose then it’s working like a charm. If this is an accident, then your accidents end with a purpose. Thanks for making my going a lot smoother. I was almost starting to second guess my decisions But you’re making it very clear to me. I am just someone to use. Someone to take advantage of Someone to do your bidding Thank you with all of my heart. You have shown me the light. Thank you for not making a bigger fool of me.
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posted on 12/26/2008&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;07:12&nbs-08:00;pm

Yeah..... You do this to me.

Come closer Tonight is the night we finalize our goodbyes. Tomorrow I will be nothing but a faded memory And when you look down you will always think of me. I will forever be the shadow that dances in the corner of your eye. Don’t cry. Don’t ever let those tears fall. Para siempre I will be here for you in your dreams. You will grow and become everything you have ever dreamed of being. I will watch over you and open the doors along the way. When you feel alone just look at the ground and you’ll always see my shadow smiling up at you. But tonight forget that bullshit Tonight is about loving like you’ve never loved before. Tonight is about being unafraid of your thoughts and fears. Tonight is about me and you. Hey I got a question to ask. Do Mexicans go to Heaven? I hope to see you there when your time is up. Hopefully you’ll still look the same as the last time I laid my tired eyes upon you. Your cute little dimples That silly little grin you get The black hat you always turn sideways. The way you are always looking at yourself in the mirror. I love how you love yourself. Yeah I hope that’s how you are when I see you again. And that first hug after forever apart I really hope feels as sweet as the first hug that was ever snuck in the kitchen. I hope that your lips taste as sweet as that very first stolen kiss. Man you made my heart race a million times apart. I thought I was going to faint. The ground was looking really comforting at that moment. I was so scared. I get knots in my stomach whenever you cross my mind. And I when I actually see you standing in front of me, my God. The things you do to my head.
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posted on 12/26/2008&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;07:12&nbs-08:00;pm

Mother

Hearing the words of hate ring through my ears on a daily basis. Your tone of voice is killing my soul. I see the daggers shoot from your eyes whenever you look upon me I run away so many times You keep calling me back Yet every time I return, you remind me how much of a fuck up I am and that I failed you from the moment I was conceived. If I am such a fuck up, then why didn’t you pull the plug when you had the chance? Why didn’t you end my suffering when they legally gave you the chance? Did you see potential? Did you feel remorse for blaming me for every thing that was wrong in your life? Or did you not want to be the bad person in the end? Well I hope that you know that in the end, you are the bad person. I want you to know that the guilt you feel is real. I want you to know that the feelings you hide at night will never go away. Those tears that fall and the screams you muffle into your pillow are my pain seeping into your pathetic soul. I hope that you never live in peace knowing what you have done to me or what you have allowed to be done to me
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posted on 12/26/2008&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;07:12&nbs-08:00;pm

...................

I lie here listening for footsteps in the hall. Praying that you will not return again It hurts so much You forced me to go too far last time. You have made me grow up too fast. My childhood is not the same. It hurts so badly when you are home. You break me. You bruise me You make me cry out silently in my head. The agony in my eyes shines through And I have to stare at the ground to avoid the judgment of the world watching my every move. I have so much hurt. So much pain. So much guilt. Why can’t you just find a new toy? I am only seven years old.
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posted on 12/26/2008&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;07:12&nbs-08:00;pm

Just Like This

Slowly I escape your grasp You tighten your grip But I slither away Running scared I fear my own footsteps Your shadow lingers behind Taunting my tired pursuit My eyes play tricks on me Making images flicker and dance Appearing larger then they are My heart is pounding My soul is weakening You growl in the distance Your fiery breath burns the small hairs on my neck I can feel your fangs sinking into me I cannot see you any longer My eyes have grown black and comatose I am suddenly stopped My feet are cemented into the ground I am sinking rapidly into your arms My screams muffled by your poisonous lips My body is still My heart slowly stops My breathing is suffocated You are sucking my soul from my body I am no longer attached I look upon myself through your eyes Screaming inside as I watch my body fall to the pavement I am trapped within you again You have won the chase. You are the cat and I am now your prey Forever lost in the depths of your evil web Never to see daylight again I fade and wait Watching as you prepare the hunt of your next prey
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posted on 12/26/2008&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;07:12&nbs-08:00;pm

Him

Your voice rings in my ears like the soft melodies strummed by the angels. Your scent lingers on my senses like the first puff of the sweetest cigar. Forever you surround me. Your smell in the pillow Your voice in my phone Your clothes strung throughout my path. Yet you are never really here. I fight for my breath every time someone says your name. My heart constricts every time I see your face. When the door of my car slams, it reminds me so vividly of the last time you left me. Your reflection shines in my mirror and I tap my brakes. Wishing you would come running back to me. That will never be a reality. The fog takes you from my sight. The pain in my heart is forever written. You’ll never come back again.
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