JEFF's blog: "i am so confused..."

heh, i'm hungover today but been invited to someones house party tonight so i'm gonna have to get better....fast. anyway the reasons of my legend night was because in my drunken state i tend to get a lot of admirers.....ahem. god knows how much i drank last night, but i'm paying for it to be honest. got fingered in a pub last night! by a mates exes cousin! lol! small world and all that bollocks! but seriously, i think whatever i drank is in my system coz i still feel twatted. oh god i was supposed to take my meds last night but i didn't coz i couldn't be arsed. currently listening to metalica with abby who also feels like shit. and all that jazz! (gets up and starts dancing) nah not really! lol! can't be fucked! i stink of beer i think, i should fucking hope so! lol! oh yeah, and for anyone reading this, feel free to look at my photos and shizz! some of them i look kinda sexual! lol! ok, i'm gonna fuck off now, i like sex! goodbye!

everything is all good today, feeling mentally and physically better. not been well for a while, but i got diagnosed with a psychotic disorder! fancy that. they can't tell whether i have either paranoid or disorganised schitzoprenia. which is fun. yay! off to wales today, with me mate abby to get away from my shithole town.

well heres the link for the pic! enjoy! lol! [ fubar.com photo: 3410928978 ]

i don't like this medicine i've been put on by the psychiatrist, its an antipsychotic called olanzapine (also known by the brand name zyprexa) and i feel like i have slight brain damage. to be homnest i'm a bit scared its gonna fuck me up even more. still fucking wanker single! but at this moment in time i really couldn't care less. my brain feels like its frying! i feel like i'm gona pass out most of the bloody time, i wish i wasn't so fucked up sometimes. it gets a bit too much after a while, people all think i'm insane. well thats coz i am, but i don't wanna be someones lab rat. oh fuck sake i'm so fed up. people are annoying me and i feel like i'm dying. fucking great.

well, i just seem to be having one of those days where i'm sad but feeling quite at peace. all my friends seem to be going away to live with their boyfriends/girlfriends and i'm like the only single one out of my friends. it is quite depressing at times like today where everyone just seems to be rubbing it in my face. cunts. anyway, i'm going to use my single status to focus my mind into writing a story about a girl who gets taken to a psychiatric hospital at the age of 6. i'm just looking up some images now.