I've seen a couple of my old friends and talked to a couple more. I've yet to decide if that's a good thing or a bad thing...
Some of my old friends, I love getting a chance to spend time with. Our best memories are from before my worst times and we're making new ones after. People like Debbie, Bob, John... these are the people I miss that I know is a good thing. I've no doubt that I can share my life with them and they'd never pull me back down!
Then there is this other group... They were a part of my life through some of the same time period, but not all of it. A crowd of people a decade younger than me, that don't know that ten years of me as the others do. There fondest memories of me are memories I've tried to forget! It was a horrible time in my life, the worst. I'd like to build new memories with them, but I don't want to reflect on a lot of the past memories with them. I don't want to be reminded of or have to explain that part of my life. I've tried to move past it and make a better life. They have too, but remembering isn't a bad thing for them. The memories are good ones for them to have, but from a time I didn't really like myself. Does that make sense? I love them and miss them dearly, but for different reasons than theirs...
I'll probably spend what time I can with them. After all, I'm trying to convince my husband to move away. If he agrees, the old friends won't be a direct part of my life at all anymore! I'll enjoy making as many new memories as I can and hope the bitterness will pass with time...
