Regrets, strong and precise, turning what was once joy into a piercing pain. Dumbfounded by the way things have changed,as if over night, driving me in insane. What I can control and what I can't, such a difference it makes in how you feel. Why I won't turn my back on those I care for, I can't belive this is real. Mistakes are a part of the grand scheme of things, we all make them at one time or another. Yet I must pay for things that others do, I feel like I am about to smother. Silence is the solace that I do now seek. The accusations in your voice are making you reek. I can't see the other side, the place where I was not to long ago. The bullshit of things that do not affect me are now the only things you seem to want to know. I will not play this game for you, I will not play it for me. There is no excuse in pig headed determination, you see only what you want to see. I am not the person that can give comfort when that is not what I feel in my heart. I am not willing to let petty dillusions tear my world apart. Sympathetic and caring, yes those things are what I will remain. Tainted from hate and pity I will never be, those things are nothing more than a drain. They take from you the person that I once knew. They profess such feeling yet nothing else can get through. What happened to the understanding, to the gentleness that I once saw when I looked into your eyes? How can it just disappear, just fade away into the revolving door of lost innocence and lies?
