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hmmm

so i have a hard time speaking these days ... i dont thinki really talk to anyone its like a big push i am pushing everthing everyone away i dont wanna be here for anytone and i dont really want much of anything the thins i long for i dont know i dot memer the lst tiem i got what i wanted and its always hurting and nothing feels good nothing tastes good and i am alone i make my self be but i sick of being desired and not wanted i sick of helping opl and getting nothing for it i tired of being whateer i am now just a shadow me me u know i stopped caring its bad t say it but i realy have stopped caring i wish i was over i am just soo fucking tired of the nightmares i am sick of the not sleeping i hate the panic attaxks i hate feeling weak i dont wanna be a shell of me i am hollow and i hate it i feel pointless and i sic of looking fr ppl to confort me i sm pass the poit of wanting to explain my self not to anyone not even my self
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