greywolf52's blog: "Hero's"

In todays world we often hear the word Hero, We have many Heros today with our troups fighting in Iraq and other countries. I will always have them in my prayers.  But sitting here today loking at this myspace thing and what I can do differently to it, I saw the category about Heros, and I had listed Mom and Dad. They are my true heros in life. The sad part is it takes them not being here to realize just how Heroic they were.

In the middle 60's my mother found out she had tumor on her tongue that left her with no taste.  Imagine not being able to taste anything at all.  A few years later we found out she had a brain tumor behind her left ear. That left her with no earing in her left ear, partially paralized on the left side of her face, and also she lost the ability to produce tears in her left eye. All of this would cause most people to quit, give up, want to no longer exist.  And I can recall many times that Mom said those very words, she couldnt go on.  But she did.  Not only did she go on, but a few years after her brain tumor surgery we went to Mayo clinic for yet another surgery .  They had a way to reconstruct a tear duct in her eye. Sadly I dont think it ever really worked the way it should have.  I can always remember seeing her with a patch over her eye so that it wouldnt dry out on her. She constantly had to put drops in her eye to keep it moist. 

Despite not being able to taste anything at all, she was the best cook that has ever put food in front of me.  Despite all of the pain and agony she had each and every day she was there for her children. And despite it alll,she was there with her husband. 

 Our father was a trooper in that he never gave in either. He worked a job he hated for over 40 yrs Im guessing. As he got older,he not only worked that job, but also took on the job of cleaning our uncles church and day care. The times that mom wasnt up to cooking, cleaning or laundry, he was there to do it for her, and for us. He never once wavered in his love for the woman he married. Over 50 yrs of marriage, each day as good as the one before. You could see the love in their eyes. Sure they had their ups and downs through the years, we all do.  I recall one time when I lived in Texas, mom called. We always seemed to talk on Wednesday for some reason.  It was like our day. But this one time we were talking, I asked How dad was, she said I dont know, we arent talking.  I kinda laughed a litttle and asked what was wrong.  She just said they werent talking.  I said oh come on, surely you two are talking somehow or someway.  Yep, they were talking, only not in words.  They would sit across from each other and make faces at each other. So even in times of discontent they still showed their love for each other. Words dont always have to be spoken to show our love and affection .

 When mom had her stoke in Late 2000, I was living in Chicago at the time.  I have few regrets in life, but one would be not being here when i was needed most. Seeing this woman that was my mother laying there, helpless and unable to eat, get up, talk or smile the little crooked  smile that we had seen for close to 40yrs was the hardest thing ive ever had to go through. She made it for 4 more months before she passed away to be with her brothers and parents.

It was a few years later that Dad had to have bypass surgery. I was still living in Chicago. I had a great job, making good money and a lot of friends . But I knew it was time to get back down here.  I had missed so much while I lived away from st louis and didnt want to miss the time I could have with Him. I moved back in May 2005 to spend what time was left with him. He passed away in Spet 2005.   Its a move that one can never regret.  It doesnt matter who you are or where you are, time with your parents are and should be cherished .  It takes very special people to go through what they did in their lives. Not once did their love ever waver. 

They are my heros and always will be.