Over 30,047 people are online! Join now and start making friends!
Buzz Meter: sh*t faced!
 
Points: 334,233,314
34 Year Old · Female · From Hermiston, OR · fuMarried to: Mayhem FM2 H... · fu-Owned by DJ INcorrigible... and is worth 200,000,000 fubucks. · Joined on January 4, 2012 · Born on November 24th · I have a crush on someone and 5 different people have a crush on me!

Family is often born of blood, but it doesn't depend on blood. Nor is it exclusive of friendship. Family members can be your best friends, you know. And best friends, whether or not they are related to you, can be your family.














Notice this

I sit here thinking how sweet life really is
How someone can whisper your name a thousand miles away
and you hear it in your heart.

I sit here thinking how crazy life really is
How someone can come into your life and fill you with so much love
and fill your life up and open your heart.

I sit here thinking how messed up life really is
How someone can say a simple sintence
and make you wonder whats really in your heart.

I sit here thinking how great life really is
How someone can make you feel alive
and at same time make you want to cut out your heart.

I sit here thinking how wonderful life really is
How someone came into your life one day
and you cant think of them ever not being there cause they stole your heart.

I sit here thinking how amazing life really is
How someone can mean so much to you
and how they never know how much love for them is in your heart.

I sit here thinking how blind life really is
How someone can not see that they mean so much to me
and how really alone it feels when they say the things that break your heart.

I sit here thinking how simple life really is
How someone can be so kind
and still have someone be so mean and break your heart.

I sit here thinking how meaningless life really is
How someone noone everyone can hurt you with simple words
and how people wont even notice you when you dont have a heart.

2012 CHell aka Heavenlee Dawn

34 Year Old · Female · From Hermiston, OR · fuMarried to: Mayhem FM2 H... · fu-Owned by DJ INcorrigible... and is worth 200,000,000 fubucks. · Joined on January 4, 2012 · Born on November 24th · I have a crush on someone and 5 different people have a crush on me!
Interests
Have you ever noticed...?

Have you ever noticed that noone is as they seem?
There is no Black and White but Billions of shades of grey.
There are those who seem to be nice to get what they want,
there are those who are to hide the pain inside.

Have you ever noticed that noone notices?
Noone sees the pain you feel when noone notices
They do not care nor even share a moment of time,
they are too busy or too blind to see the hurt they cause.

Have you ever noticed that people cry out for help in different ways.
No two people express themselves in the same ways.
Some yell, Some cry, some hurt themselves,
Others do not notice the quiet ones until its too late.

Have you ever noticed the ones hurting the most are the ones all alone?
Locked away from the cruel world, the heartless millions, the endless pain.
They hide in there homes with no family or friends,
they wither away desperately seeking that one person who cares.

Have you ever noticed how cruel people can be?
Hatred and rage tears and sorrow pain and heartbreak.
The quiet one secretly screaming out for a friend,
the one in the corner crying all alone that noone notices.

Have you ever noticed the world moves so fast it cant notice anything?
Spinning around day after day so happy and free wrapped in there perfect little bubble.
Someday they will see that they didnt noticed the girl whos always alone,
or the boy who bullies cause noone cares or the one who who'd rather die than live.

Have you ever noticed you didnt see hear or try?
Busting along in your perfect world only seeing your own problems.
Someday you will pass her the one who has finally given up,
the one who sot out a friendship in you and you blew them off.

Have you ever noticed that you could have a made a difference?
Taking a min to ask a simple how are you? or is everything ok?
Someday I hope when you need it most you dont find you have noone,
that you never find yourself hurting so much and ending up completely alone.

Have you ever noticed that noone notices?
Dont wait till its too late, Dont wait till you cant do anything.
Slow yourself down and look around,
make a difference in the world one person at a time.

NOTICE

10/18/2013 Chell aka Heavenlee Dawn

"Fuckin' Perfect"

Made a wrong turn once or twice
Dug my way out, blood and fire
Bad decisions, that's alright
Welcome to my silly life

Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood
Miss 'No way, it's all good'
It didn't slow me down.
Mistaken, always second guessing
Underestimated, look I'm still around

You're so mean when you talk
About yourself. You were wrong.
Change the voices in your head
Make them like you instead.

So complicated,
Look happy, You'll make it!
Filled with so much hatred
Such a tired game
It's enough, I've done all I could think of
Chased down all my demons
I've seen you do the same
(Ohh ohhhhhhh)

The whole world's scared, so I swallow the fear
The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer
So cool in line and we try try try but we try too hard
And it's a waste of my time.
Done looking for the critics, cause they're everywhere
They don't like my jeans, they don't get my hair
Exchange ourselves and we do it all the time
Why do we do that, why do I do that (why do I do that)?

Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
Like you're less than fucking perfect.
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel
Like you're nothing, you are perfect to me.

Pink

"How Do You Get That Lonely"

It was just another story printed on the second page
Underneath the Tiger's football score
It said he was only eighteen, a boy about my age
They found him face down on his bedroom floor

There'll be services on Friday at the Lawrence Funeral Home
Then out on Mooresville highway, they'll lay him 'neath a stone...

Did his girlfriend break up with him, did he buy or steal that gun?
Did he lose a fight with drugs or alcohol?
Did his Mom and Daddy forget to say I love you son?
Did no one see the writing on the wall?

I'm not blamin' anybody, we all do the best we can
I know hindsight's 20/20, but I still don't understand...

How do you get that lonely, how do you hurt that bad
To make you make the call, that havin' no life at all
Is better than the life that you had
How do you feel so empty, you want to let it all go
How do you get that lonely... and nobody knows

Blaine Larsen


I've been searchin', wonderin', thinkin' Lost and lookin' all my life I've been wounded, jaded, loved and hated I've wrestled wrong and right I've been readin', writin', prayin', fightin' I guess I would be still, that was until I knew you. if there were no words no way to speak i would still hear you if there were no tears no way to feel inside i'd still feel for you all of my life i have been waiting for all you give to me you've opened my eyes and shown me how to love unselfishly i've dreamed of this a thousand times before in my dreams i couldn't love you more i will give you my heart until the end of time and even if the sun refused to shine even if romance ran out of rhyme you would still have my heart until the end of time 'cause all i need is you, you're all i need, my love The sun is shinin' everyday The clouds never get in the way for you and me I've known you just a month or two But baby I'm so into you Can hardly breathe I never knew that I could feel like this Can hardly wait till our next kiss If I'm dreamin' please don't wake me up 'Cause baby I can't get enough Of what you do And I'm in so totally Wrapped up emotionally Attracted so physically Actin' so recklessly I need you so desperately And I'm so electrically Charged up kinetically Actin' erractically Need you fanatically You get to me magically Sure as your eyes are blue Baby I love you Do you love me too

Lemons are sweet as honey Usually life is fair Purple's a shade of money and Jesus doesn't care Hummingbirds don't fly backwards Lovers don't say goodbye Saturn has 7 rings And I have never told a lie I never dream of you and me It's strange I don't know why I'm really not that lonely You never cross my mind And when I hear your name It doesn't cut me like a knife This is how I keep my sanity This is what I need you to believe I don't walk these halls And I don't climb these walls every night And I don't cry And even though I'm waiting by the phone I don't want you to call I don't miss you at all Lies All lies



I've been searchin', wonderin', thinkin' Lost and lookin' all my life I've been wounded, jaded, loved and hated I've wrestled wrong and right I've been readin', writin', prayin', fightin' I guess I would be still, that was until I knew you.I'm in so totally Wrapped up emotionally Attracted so physically Actin' so recklessly I need you so desperately And I'm so electrically Charged up kinetically Actin' erractically Need you fanatically You get to me magically Sure as your eyes are blue Baby I love you Do you love me too
Music
http://youtu.be/-BIye98Ryic

Latest Status

  • Heavenlee Dawn ... "one is not born into a family but is brought into it with love, it may be that blood is thicker than water but love is thicker than blood and love binds hearts together to form a true and honest family."~HD
    10 hrs ago · Comment

Activity Feed

  • Heavenlee Dawn ... The way u talk, the way u teaseThe way u look, the way u laugh,The way u love w/all u have,The way u kiss, The way u cry,I love ur attitude, ur rose tattoo, ur every thoughtUr dance, ur drive, u make me feel aliveUr smile & ur lips
  • Heavenlee Dawn ... uploaded 152 new photos!
    3 days ago
    .
  • 1 wk ago · Reply
  • SHADOW FuENGAGE...Heavenlee Dawn ...
    Miss my lil Chick-A-Dee ,Ma

    1 wk ago · Reply
  • 2 wks ago · Reply
  • Heavenlee Dawn ...
    The world is quiet, like there is no one around, but I feel you beside meI know the secrets, you keep locked away inside Don't understand why you're fighting I know she must be special, this new girl by your side I seek for answers when I look into your eyes, And it hurts like hell but, I will be strong You made me love you, love you right from the start You're controlling my heart, babe Don't pack your bags yet Give me time to say goodbye (Say goodbye) Just don't leave me wounded No, I just hope you will regret the things you do Come back to me, 'cause our love is the real thing And it hurts like hell, but I will be strong.. I knew that I, I fought to keep our love strong If you leave me now, you come running back for more, babe And I hope for, and I wish for, and I pray, that the words from your mouth can, eventually make you a man... For once in your life, be a man... When everything stops - for a minute in your life, I'll hope that, for once in your life, be a man Just tell me the words, 'cause I know that you can, Don't leave me with scars, that no one can heal

    2 wks ago · Reply
  • Heavenlee Dawn ...
    There's another world inside of me That you may never see There're secrets in this life That I can't hide Somewhere in this darkness There's a light that I can't find Maybe it's too far away... Or maybe I'm just blind... When your education X-Ray Cannot see under my skin I won't tell you a damn thing That I could not tell my friends Roaming through this darkness I'm alive but I'm alone Part of me is fighting this But part of me is gone So hold me when I'm here Right me when I'm wrong Hold me when I'm scared And love me when I'm gone Everything I am And everything in me Wants to be the one You wanted me to be I'll never let you down Even if I could I'd give up everything If only for your good So hold me when I'm here Right me when I'm wrong You can hold me when I'm scared You won't always be there So love me when I'm gone

    2 wks ago · Reply
  • Heavenlee Dawn ...
    I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut My weakness is that I care too much And my scars remind me that the past is real I tear my heart open just to feel Drunk and I'm feeling down And I just wanna be alone I'm pissed cause you came around Why don't you just go home Cause you channel all your pain And I can't help you fix yourself You're making me insane All I can say is I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut My weakness is that I care too much And our scars remind us that the past is real I tear my heart open just to feel I tried to help you once Against my own advice I saw you going down But you never realized That you're drowning in the water So I offered you my hand Compassions in my nature Tonight is our last stand I'm drunk and I'm feeling down And I just wanna be alone You shouldn't ever come around Why don't you just go home? Cause you're drowning in the water And I tried to grab your hand And I left my heart open But you didn't understand Go fix yourself I can't help you fix yourself But at least I can say I tried I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life I can't help you fix yourself But at least I can say I tried I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life

    2 wks ago · Reply
  • Heavenlee Dawn ...
    Pain, without love Pain, I can't get enough Pain, I like it rough 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all You're sick of feeling numb You're not the only one I'll take you by the hand And I'll show you a world that you can understand This life is filled with hurt When happiness doesn't work Trust me and take my hand When the lights go out you will understand Pain, without love Pain, I can't get enough Pain, I like it rough 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all Pain, without love Pain, I can't get enough Pain, I like it rough 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all Anger and agony Are better than misery Trust me I've got a plan When the lights go off you will understand Pain, without love Pain, I can't get enough Pain, I like it rough 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all Pain, without love Pain, I can't get enough Pain, I like it rough 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing Rather feel pain I know (I know I know I know I know) That you're wounded You know (You know you know you know you know) That I'm here to save you You know (You know you know you know you know) I'm always here for you I know (I know I know I know I know) That you'll thank me later Pain, without love Pain, can't get enough Pain, I like it rough 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all Pain, without love Pain, I can't get enough Pain, I like it rough 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all Pain, without love Pain, I can't get enough Pain, I like it rough 'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all Rather feel pain than nothing at all Rather feel pain

    2 wks ago · Reply
  • Heavenlee Dawn ...
    I haven't been to church since I don't remember when Things were goin' great 'til they fell apart again So I listened to the preacher as he told me what to do He said you can't go hatin' others who have done wrong to you Sometimes we get angry, but we must not condemn Let the good Lord do His job and you just pray for them I'm really glad I found my way to church 'Cause I'm already feelin' better and I thank God for the words Yeah I'm goin' take the high road And do what the preacher told me to do You keep messin' up and I'll keep prayin' for you I pray your tire blows out at 110 I pray you pass out drunk with your best friend and wake up with his and her tattoos I pray your brakes go out runnin' down a hill I pray a flowerpot falls from a window sill and knocks you in the head like I'd like to I pray your birthday comes and nobody calls I pray you're flyin' high when your engine stalls I pray all your dreams never come true Just know wherever you are, near or far, in your house or in your car, wherever you are honey, I pray for you.I pray for you

    2 wks ago · Reply
  • Heavenlee Dawn ...
    In the beginning The nights were long Under the moonlight I could do no wrong You told me I was everything you wanted me to be Then summer was over And the nights grew cold You got restless And hard to holdI tried to be Everything you wanted me to be Now you keep staring At that open door You got what you wanted And you still want more Well look at me I'm everything you wanted me to be Remember me? I was everything you wanted me to be If I don't keep you satisfied You can't say that I haven't tried And if I'm not what you want by now For the life of me I can't see how I'll ever be Everything that you want me to be

    2 wks ago · Reply
  • Heavenlee Dawn ...
    Looking back she thinks about that moment in the sand And what was just a summer flingGot so far out of handShe knew that he was taken, But she gave in anywayShe believed it when she heard him say...Soon I'll be free to be with youSoon I'll be telling you know who the facts of lifeI want you to be my wife and our dreams will all come trueSoonChristmas finds her all along with no CAUSE to rejoiceSo she calls his CODE-A-PHONE just to hear his voiceShe knows that it's useless, but she does it anywayAnd she knows how to answer before she hears him say...Soon, I can't talk to you right nowSoon, you'll hear a beap and you know how to play this gameLeave your number and your name, and I promise I'll call backSoonSomeday slowly turns to neverTears and champagne offer no solutionHe'll say soon to her foreverSo she makes her new years resolutionSoon she won't call him anymoreSoon, when he shows up at her door and Ask's her when can I be with you againIt'll be her turn to saySoon.

    2 wks ago · Reply
  • Hot Rod 1962Heavenlee Dawn ...
    Happy Hump Day Dawn!

    3 wks ago · Reply
  • Heavenlee Dawn ... You're sick of feeling numb You're not the only one I'll take you by the hand And I'll show you a world that you can understand This life is filled with hurt When happiness doesn't work Trust me and take my hand When the lights go out you will understand
    3 wks ago · Comment
This member is viewable by:everyone
user.php' rendered in 1.2428 seconds on machine '185'.