So heres the thing i know that i am a horrible rotten cheating bitch. I love Chris Very much and never intended to hurt him. What am i supposed to I love them both. Ken for the year that we have had together and the kids we have. Chris on the other hand makes me feel beautiful wich hasnt happened in a long ass time. i know that i would have stability with Ken but the lack of trust on his end hinders sooooo much. Not to mention the fact that i know for a fact he would never give up his longing for all that is lusty for me. Chris faithfull devoted charishin chris what else can i say. I am sooooo confused and dont know wich way to lead. I know if i left Chris yet again it would be the end no more chances for redemption and i dont want to make a rash disicion. I dont think ken realy is in love with me anymore, i know that he cares very deeply for me and our children but somtimes i feel like all i was was a breeder for him an enqubator. I also know that Chris is very young and somday is going to want kids of his own (already does) but unfortunatly Ken and I made the desision to have my tubes tied cut and burned after xander was born......... someone help me
