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angswtdrmr's blog: "MY THOUGHTS"

created on 01/04/2007  |  http://fubar.com/my-thoughts/b40928

HAHAHA...more jokes

MOMMIES BLACK SPONGE Little Johnny sees his mother walk out of the shower and sees her vagina. He asks her what it is and she embarassed replies, "Oh, that's mommy's black sponge." A few days later, Johnny spills a glass of milk on the floor and says, "Mommy, I need your black sponge to mop up the milk!" She replies, "I lost it, honey." A couple of days later, he comes running up to her and says, "Mommy, I found your black sponge!" Mystified, she says, "Where, honey?" Little Johnny says, "It's over at Mrs. Johnson's house, and Daddy's washing his face in it!" ________________________________________________ DANCE WITH ME Two men at a bar had been enjoying a few drinks for the past couple of hours and were pretty drunk when one of them notices a beautiful woman sitting in the corner. One says to the other, "Jeez, I'd really like to dance with that girl." The other man replies, "Well go ahead and ask her, don't be a chicken shit." So the man approaches the lovely woman and says, "Excuse me. Would you be so kind as to dance with me?" Seeing the man is totally drunk the woman says, "I'm sorry. Right now I'm concentrating on matrimony and I'd rather sit than dance." So the man humbly returns to his friend. "So what did she say?" asks the friend. The drunk responded, "She said she's constipated on macaroni and would rather shit in her pants." _________________________________________________ PREGNANT WITH TRIPLETS There are two girls and a boy. SHe is standing in a quik-e-mart one day, when the shop is robbed. She is shot three times in the stomach. The doctor tells her the babies will be fine, but with some odd side effects. 13 years later, she is fixing dinner, and the oldest, a girl, walks in sobbing. The mother says,"Sweetie, whats wrong?!" The daughter replies,"I was going to the bathroom and a bullet came out!!!" the mother tells her there is no need to worry, and sends her on her way. The next day as the mother is cooking dinner, the second oldest, a girl, walks in sobbing, "Mommy, I was going to the bathroom and a bullet came out!!!" The mother tells her there is no need to worry and that the same thing had happened to her sister, then sends he on her way. The next day, the mother is preparing dinner, and her youngest, a boy, walks in sobbing. The mother is prepared for him to do this, so she says,"Honey its ok, I know that you were going to the bathroom and a bullet came out, right?" Her son sobs harder,"NO thats not what happened!" The mother says," Then why are you crying?!" Her son replies," I was Jacking off and I shot the dog!!!" ________________________________________________
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