Sometimes the most unexpected things are the greatest things! I mean really he was so unexpected i was at the hardest part of my life and yet there he was! He was there when he shouldnt of been.. He wasnt the one who needed to be there! the person who should have been there wasnt! I love him so much.. what do i do now? Where, who do i turn to now? Everyday when i wake up he is the first person i want to talk to! It is so hard somedays to even get out of bed knowing that im going to be alone all day and miserable and even worse that i cant talk to him... I cant hear his voice!! I have a voice mail i just listen to over and over again.. Some of the things it says hurt so bad to hear but if thats the only way i can hear his voice.. Well i guess its worth it!! He is the only one who can make the hurting stop and he doesnt even care! It wouldnt hurt so bad if he would just say someday maybe.. But no i just keep hearing NEVER again!!! It hurts soo bad some of the things he says tear my heart out again and again.... yet i still love him!! Wtf is wrong with me? i should hate him... GRRRRRRRRRRR i am so stupid!!
