Sharkfin's blog: "Chaos"

I am going to try to figure out the difference between Groundhogs and woodchucks. Is there? First, I would like to explain exactly what a woodchuck is; A woodchuck is a small American rodent, also called a groundhog. I would also like to say that by doing this; I mean no offence to woodchucks whatsoever or hogs of the ground. I will now be attempting to answer the question that has left mankind wondering since the beginning: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, and chuck as much wood as a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood. I know you’ll think that I have Actually lost it, but I looked it up on the internet one day, partly to prepare for this, but partly because I actually had nothing better to do, but apparently: A woodchuck could chuck 700 pounds of wood since a woodchuck chucks that amount of dirt while digging it’s burrow, so logically, it should be able to chuck the same amount of wood. This got me thinking though, I mean, surely there are technicalities, which would vary the amount of wood that a woodchuck would chuck. I should warn you; from this point on, it gets very repetitive, and you will probably be rather bored, however, I must insist; no self-mutilation, it’s not nice for the people sitting near you. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it was actually a squirrel, posing as a woodchuck? How much wood would an extremely small woodchuck chuck? How much wood would an extremely large woodchuck chuck? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it was a genetically modified super woodchuck? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it was a blind woodchuck? How much wood would a computer-generated woodchuck chuck? How much wood would a robot woodchuck chuck? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it had too much to eat? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it didn’t want to chuck wood, but was being forced to by a man with a gun? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it had a broken arm? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if the wood was on fire? What if the woodchuck was on fire? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck from the top of a tall building? Hmmm wood have to have wood up there. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck in space? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck in a small box? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck underwater? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it was being paid to chuck wood? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it was trying to impress a lady woodchuck? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck in a wood-chucking contest with a rival woodchuck? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck with an automatic wood-chucking machine? I bet you’re all extremely bored now, How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it only had 5 minutes to chuck wood? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it was being distracted by a very loud chicken? Would a woodchuck chuck a wooden woodchuck? How much wood would a woodchuck leave for other woodchucks to chuck? How much ground would a groundhog hog if a groundhog could hog ground? Ok, I know, I know don’t get me started on ground hog version of this… How many woodchucks does it take to screw in a light bulb? It would take 16 to 15 to chuck wood into a pile, and the other one to climb up the wood and screw in the light bulb. Are prairie dog’s related to the woodchuck? Ok now if that woodchuck did not see his shadow this morning I want all the recipes you know for groundhog emailed to me. Because I am so tired of snow and cold and just want spring to appear, well let’s say NOW! Have a wonderful day and may the Groundhog see its shadow. Oh yeah GOOD MORNING!!!! A huge hug and three pats…oh yes the red color print.. It’s national wear red day for heart awareness so I am doing my part Marty