vanilla24's blog: "Fronters!!"

These children with their red apple cheeks and runny noses fill my heart to the brim! They frolic like puppies turning end over end again and again and again. How innocent and clever their eyes are...full of love for Grandma and her cookie jar. They joyfully exclaim throwing their arms open wide when I arrive and give exquisitely sweet kisses and hugs and waves goodbye. My oh my oh my ! Grandma's eyes are never dry!

How much I love you my darling love, I have no idea about this... it really is hard to tell, Its hard to describe... hard to say, But I just want you right beside me all the time, When moon is out I sit under the starry sky eyes closed I pray, The only thing I shudder of is losing you, Can't even imagine how world would be without you, I might not say it quite often my angel, But, this heart of mine is yours and I love you, I dream of you as my soulmate as the owner of my soul, I dream of you as my sweet heart wife, This life would be nothing without you, Without you life would be struggle and strife, I can imagine our wedding my love, I can picture you and me standing in the candle lit church, After the sacred holy vows, I give you the bonding kiss, The gap between my fingers is made for your fingers, When you take my hand and it perfectly fits, When you rest your head on my shoulder, oh sweet heart, I dream a thousand dreams, I leave this world for a while, I love it when you hug me tightly in your arms, I love it when you say you are forever mine, The rise of the morning sun, I see in your eyes, Your face is home of charms with your serene smile, You take my heart away without a single word, You make my heart beat another zillion times, God is really kind, he is true like his name, How will I ever thank great lord for what he has done for me, I am blessed by his eternal care that is your endless love, You are more than a heavenly angel more than a goddess can ever be... You're all I ever wanted my babe... my life, All that I ever dared dream of I have it with me now, I dream of a world of romance with you, I dream of me and you taking our wedding vows, When I am sleepless and lonely, I sit outside and watch the stars of midnight sky, When you're not here with me, Thoughts of you passes through my mind, The way you move, you fly without wings, Your words the way you talk they make me hush, I see everything in your eyes, its crystal clear for me, Your eyes are as deep as oceans of love, I just want to love you all my life and there's nothing else I want to do, I might not say it quite often my life but I am blessed, Blessed by lord's biggest love, your immense love which is so very true, All I want to say is that I love you, I dream of a tomorrow and a lifetime with you..

A once carefree girl Remains troubled, shattered in pain. A boy she cared dearly for, Stole her heart, With no love in return. She resides in a shady hole. A hole which remains in her heart, Caused by this cold boy. Her mind shadowed by twisted thoughts, Just waiting patiently for someone to clear the rain. Can she ever love again? Will she ever feel the warmth of devotion? When will she finally heal? Will she ever be adored, For the gem she is? Anxious to open her heart, Scared to love and feel again. She never ceases to stop, Looking for the one, To show her endless affection. A whirlwind of dreams, Cloud her mind. Blocking out, All negativity. The strong need for someone, To rescue her from the rain. The shadows have cleared, Now more smiles and no more tears. Her heart once again open to affection and love. No more rain, never-ending pure sunshine. The truth has revealed, She is loved by her prince. There will never be a rainbow, Without a little rain.

The image I portray is only an illusion, To cover up the truth that I do need attention. I look fine on the outside but I've disconnected, I don't believe in anyone that can't be trusted. I'm unreachable cause I've slowly faded away, But I can still fool you with what I put on display. You will never get the key to my inner true self, I'm locked cause I don't trust you or anybody else. There's a burning sensation that I have loved to hate, A feeling of emptiness in me that won't vacate. I'm trapped inside a depressed circle that has no end, Each day passes and it does get harder to pretend. I can hear your voice, it echoes within my mind, But it's my unanswered questions I'm longing to find. You won't knock down my walls that I have built around me, I've become unreachable, lost who I used to be. Copyright © staci 2006

Slowly creeping in, taking over innocent souls Suffocating in never ending pain, silently dying Endlessly stabbing soft hearts, unhealed holes Internally debating if I should just stop trying.. Falling in deeper, eternally trapped in the dark Reaching up for a hand, but left struggling all alone Choices unwisely made, to deaths door I embark Heading steadily through steel gates of the unknown.. Bony fingers followed by ebony wings grasp me Pulling me away from love, from those who care No longer fighting or having the strength to disagree The connection between life and death slowly tears..

*** Dedicted 2 all those wanna b PLAYERS..plzz..ya need 2 get a new game n all da FEMALEZ who had 2 put up wit their SHYT..lol ;) *** You say you wanna be with me But you don't want to be seen with me. You tell me that you care for But when I need you,you never there for me. Alone with me,you seem to be sweet with me Around others,you don't even want to meet with me. When you want me,you come to recieve me But then why do you decieve me? You tell me that you'll always be true to me But now I see,you're not mature to be. You say you wanna spark a blunt with me But guess what boo? I don't deal with fronters like you!