so my sister and her family left just now.its sad to say goodbye but i know i will see them in a couple months. my not so bigger than me big sister is all grown up and has a great little family.an awsome husband and two amazing kids. shes my big sister nine years older than me and an inch and a half shorter despite all our hardships she made it.so now its my turn.its my turn to go out and find someone to start a family with , im not saying it has to happen now but life as i know is just begining and im scared and excited and all that shit. i used to say i never wanted kids , i wanted to adopt because i had so many friends who were in group home nd it wasnt right i wanted to rescue them,i still feel that way but at the same time i wanna be a mom i mean i do it everyday at work i help kids grow , i help there parents learn how to teach there children, i kiss scraped knees, and sing silly little songs, and i make crying scared kids feel better and safe, i wipe away tears, and take the fears and i even scold them when they do something wrong, i walk them to the restroom and help them with there clothes hell its like im a mom already and not many people know. the people that do see it all tell me id be great but im still afraid that ill screw up.. but ikll try and thats whats important so maybe one day ill stop being so crazy and grow up .. i hope i can grow up and start a nice family when its right
