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Everything Has a Gender

Ziploc Bags are Male - they hold everything in, but you can see right through them. Copiers are Female - once turned off it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed. A Tire is Male - it goes bald and it is often over-inflated. A Hot Air Balloon is Male - to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it (of course, there's the hot air part, too). Sponges are Female - they're soft, squeezable and retain water. A Web Page is Female - it is always getting hit on. A Subway is Male - it uses the same old lines to pick people up. An Hourglass is Female - over time the weight shifts to the bottom. A Hammer is Male - it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it is handy to have around. A Remote Control is Female - it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying! A Water Faucet is Female - it can turn hot or cold in just a matter of moments. A Safety Pin is Male - it is often useful in an emergency. A Foreign Movie is Female - it is not always completely understood. A Computer is Female - even your smallest mistakes are stored in memory.
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