Have you? Have you ever had one of those days, where you just don't know where you stand with the people around you? I just found out my ex is dating someone new. We were together for the better part of 23 years. I moved out of state 2 and a half months ago. As far as him dating someone, at first it didn't seem to bother me. But I guess it is, because I couldn't sleep. I get angry with him, because he was such a controlling asshole, that he made me miserable every waking moment.
My only fear I guess, is that I will never find someone that will love me, for what I am. I have so much to give. My ex always made me feel like an ant, because I am not thin and gorgeous. It didn't matter that I took care of him, my girl, our house and our shop. Is that what all men want? Because I will never be that. So does that mean I will always be alone? Sad to waste all my caring and wanting to please someone, because of the way I look.
I see all these people around me that are happy and content with eachother, and I guess that is what I am looking for. I am afraid to love someone. I don't want to be hurt. I want a man that will love me for me. Not what he wants to change me into. I want him to tell me I am beautiful, and sexy. Because I am. All I can be is me. And all I want is to be happy.
Anyway me babbling, I just needed to vent. Have a wonderful day everyone.
