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Icarus's blog: "Augurs, Martyrs, and Agnostics"

created on 03/10/2011  |  http://fubar.com/augurs-martyrs-and-agnostics/b340021  |  8 followers

Epoch

Called it a draw

to say the best for the least

like a burn of the veins

or an itch of the brain

 

Tributes and wards of wrapped hair and dry stone

to the petty gods overhead

clanking bowls and groping for alms

their eyes taken in sick, their tongues twisted on servitude

like a cage with no doors, no windows, no bars

Am I kept in?

 

A million fingers of dark squirm from the empty.

overtaking me without time to tear my nails or to empty my lungs

the walls are too smooth

too judgemental

too clean

too high

Certainly not to keep them out.

 

Doubt.

Worming, writhing rebounding second guesses.

A thousand voice chorus of whatifs

neverwas

neverwills

never had

never should

never could.

 

And on the most well timed ejaculation of sleep.

Fade. Snap.

Awake.

Why?

Doubt.

Right.

... right...

 

This again.

And again.

And again.

 

They told me hell was just a word.

An idea.

A punitive invention of guilt and sorrow

of most marked poetry, not irony

 

but by that logic

real is but a word

a punitive ironclad boot on servile throat

brick breakfasts and gravel desserts

a solid

tangible

real

 

of...?

 

My preference would be

 

not.

 

 

 

 

grotesque

gruesome

heretical

 

to some

 

to others

relase.

Or better yet

 

 

 

 

 

sleep.

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