CinDragonFounder of ClubMysticIBIC's blog: "EMPATHY"

Empaths Tools How can these healing stones help? By holding or wearing a gemstone necklace / stone / bracelet, they can help by dissolving negative emotions and replacing them with positive energy. Aquamarine – helps you adapt to any harsh vibrations in your surroundings – provides understanding of your path and how to adapt to the denseness of the earthly vibrations without losing the “self”. It helps with communication of heart-felt things and when there is difficulty in putting feelings into words. Black Tourmaline – psychic protection (when necessary) – a good stone to carry with you when you are out in crowded areas or if someone is intentionally sending negative energy your way. Acts as a buffer from the physic bombardment. Green Jade – I wear this to give my heart a boost – It is very strengthening - keeps the heart rhythm. I often wear it in a medicine bag over my heart together with a piece of rhodochrosite, especially if I am feeling stressed at work or have a lot to deal with emotionally. Smoky Quartz - keeps you grounded if you start to “space out” or feel panicky e.g. in crowds etc. – also good for bringing spiritual energies down through the chakras so that they can be grounded and acted on. For some of us there is a tendency to “space out” or excarnate from the body when things get stressful. Smoky quartz helps us to properly incarnate into the body so that we can fully deal with what is going on. Rose Quartz – enhancing your self esteem and providing you with the love vibration needed to overcome painful feelings – like a soothing balm it gently caresses the soul helping you to “love” yourself. Helps with physical and emotional pain. Wise goddess energy – (my favorite healing stone). Rhodochrosite – Heals the inner-child. Wear when feeling vulnerable. I often feel it keeps people “off my back” when I need time to heal and have some space to myself. I find that I am treated more lovingly when I am wearing rhodochrosite –for this reason I recommend it to everyone. It is also good to clear any blockages between the heart and solar plexus - e.g stomach pains caused by an emotional upset. Lapis Lazuli – discernment – getting clear about what is your “stuff” and what is not. Can release blockages of held in emotions – very powerful – use with care. Brings things to the awareness but does not help you to deal with it. You will need to use other stones for this. Moonstone – Soothing to wear after emotional upsets, brings the emotions into balance and helps you speak loving words and be kind to yourself and others. A real goddess stone – my favourite is rainbow moonstone. Keywords that come to me when describing this stone are kindness, beauty. And balance. Sugilite is a very energizing stone for sensitive individuals. It is a spiritual stone that works at the etheric body level. It moves congestion (that emotionally compressive negative energy) in the light body before it works its way into the physical body. This congestion happens when surrounded by mental confusion or excess emotionalism that you are having trouble processing, Sugilite keeps your energy free and moving and is also beneficial for depression or melancholia. If you have a piece of sugilite it will usually let you know when it wants to be worn or used. Flower Essences: Some important essences in the life of the “Empath”: Flower essences are vibrational essences made by floating certain flowers in a bowl on pure water, placed in the sunshine for several hours, which eventually imprints the vibrational patterning (or message) of the flower into the water through a process of alchemy. The essence is then decanted and several processes of dilution occur before it is taken at dosage strength. These essences are freely available from essence makers and distributors throughout the world or of course you can make your own. It is important to meditate, be clear and attune with the plants before making your essence. White Yarrow (Achillea Millefolium white) For extreme vulnerability to others and to the environment, easily depleted, overly absorbent of negative influences The essence of the white yarrow flower seals up any “holes” in the aura and provides a protective filter from the bombardment of environmental and emotional energies that the empath is prone to absorbing. This will stop the feeling of depletion from trying to process these energies. It stabilizes and grounds a person and allows the inner light to shine through. Pink Yarrow (Achillea millefolium var. rubra – pink/purple) For lack of emotional clarity and inappropriate merging with others. Promotes loving awareness of others from a self-contained consciousness Because of the extreme openness of the empathic person, he or she will often merge with his/her environment, including the emotional aura of others. This causes emotional confusion and an inability to identify his/her own feelings from those of another. The empath will often internalize this emotional confusion in order to heal the situation. Pink Yarrow flower essence helps one to discern between ones own emotions and that of another. Golden Yarrow (Achillea filipendulina – yellow) Use when you have a tendency to withdraw and isolate yourself because of your sensitivity. For protecting oneself from vulnerability to others - Gives inner protection when in social situations. Golden Yarrow is indicated for those whose natural inclination is to avoid public limelight or performances because of acute sensitivity. This essence is like wearing a protective cloak when out in public. It shields and protects and helps the person to cope with his/her sensitivity and express himself/herself without feeling vulnerable. It can help in situations where a person has turned to drugs or alcohol in order to dull his/her sensitivity.

Recognizing Empathy in Yourself Article Written By: Lyn Rose-Hornabrook Many of us who were born with empathic abilities have not understood this “gift” until well into our adulthood. Those who were lucky enough to have parents that recognized this “gift” would have a head start in understanding how to deal with your intensely feeling life and sensitive nature. You were possibly fearful as a child because you did not understand those intense feelings, which may have made stepping out into the world quite terrifying. In my own case I was not always able to process what was going on around me as a young child and would sometimes end up having convulsions. In an unaware state, an empath will experience the feelings or pains of others - be it distress, sadness, anger, etc., and any physical pain that accompanies it, and think that it is his / her own feelings or illness. It will be quite confusing because he / she will not understand what it is that is making him / her feel that way. It can be sudden and intrusive. This “taking on” is known as surrogation. Of course this surrogation can also be beneficial – say if you are a healer and need to know exactly what needs treating in a patient. For this to be effective you need to be able to discern your own feelings from those of the other person, and be able to clear yourself effectively afterwards. The task is to learn to understand this gift– to understand how to discern between your own feelings and pain, and that of another. In this way you will have the ability to feel compassion for others from a self contained point of view instead of merging with them and taking on their pain in order to heal them. Because you understand what they are feeling you can then lead them to the correct path for them. You do not have to do it for them. Being an empath, you see people as their naked selves. No matter how hard people try to hide who they are, an empath will see through them. This can be a blessing for some who feel unable to express themselves or unnerving for others if they are trying to hide something or if some ill intent is meant. Some “Symptoms of Empathy” Acute senses – i.e. sense of smell, taste, sight, touch, hearing etc. Acute awareness of the feelings of those around them and feeling deeply for those in pain or suffering Often easily hurt Avoidance of conflict where possible preferring to keep things harmonious Easily startled by noise Easily moved to tears because of deep feeling Nervous in crowded situations People feel safe around them and able to talk to them easily. Even complete strangers will talk to them about personal things without consciously intending to do so Animals and children love and are attracted to them Easily affected by the weather Their greatest gift is to perceive with the heart They are usually a blessing to be around as they are nurturing and caring Music and harmony are very important to them. They can lose themselves completely while listening to music that resonates with them. Water is very beneficial and therapeutic to the empath.

Empathy - what is it? 1. Empathy is the ability to recognize, understand and read the emotion of another person. A simple way of describing this would be to say you put yourself in anothers' shoes. You are literally doing this and in turn it could be said that you are resonating with the other person. Some people can do this voluntarily and others do it accidentally. The process involves the ability to read in others, the energy and subtle differences in frequency associated with the range of human thought and emotion. Most people don't understand how this process works but when it comes to helping others it's enough to just recognise you have a gift and that you are sensitive to others. 2. Empaths often have telepathic ability which means that your ability to 'read' is enhanced. Some empaths have a deep sense of 'knowing' which further enhances their ability to read another person. This is very useful because people are complex and often display a persona over many layers of thought and emotion. The ability to see under the surface and sense someone's true feelings has many useful applications when it comes to helping others. 3. As the word empathy suggests, empaths have the ability to act in empathy. This helps others because you can act with compassion and understanding enabling the other person to feel they are not isolated or alone in what they are experiencing. 4. If you could measure the strength of an empaths ability you would a wide range of difference in ability. This is because of the 'human' factor. We all have varying degrees of understanding,awareness,judgement,emotion,intelligence and compassion. However everyone has empathic ability to a certain extent. For a variety of reasons people ignore or are unawre of this ability. 5. Many empaths have an interest in people and become proficient with reading body language and listening for verbal cues that betray what someone really means during the process of communication. Whislt these skilss are not empathic they do enhance the empaths ability to help someone.

Empathy Empathy is one's ability to recognize, perceive and directly feel the emotion of another person. As the states of mind, beliefs, and desires of others are intertwined with their emotions, one with empathy for another may often be able to more effectively divine another's modes of thought and mood. Empathy is often characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes", or experiencing the outlook or emotions of another being within oneself, a sort of emotional resonance.In fiction, especially science fiction or fantasy works, it may also refer to (or be associated with) a supernatural ability to read others' emotions through psychic means. An example of this are the Betazoids of Star Trek. Most psychics have empathic abilities, either developed through time and experience, or inherent from childhood. While the ability to imagine oneself as another person is a sophisticated imaginative process that only fully develops with time, as later on in life, or with considerable training, or investigation, or imagination, the roots of such ability are probably innate to the empathizer's life, training, or investigation. Human capacity to recognize the emotions of another is related to one's imitative capacities, and seems to be grounded in one's innate capacity to associate the bodily movements and facial expressions one sees in another with the proprioceptive feelings of one's corresponding movements or expressions. Humans also seem to make the same immediate connection between the tone of voice, and body language of another and one's inner feeling. Hence, by looking at the facial expressions or bodily movements of another, or by hearing another's tone of voice, one may be able to get an immediate sense of how another seems to feel on the inside. One experiences this as anything in a range, from understanding, to directly experiencing, or to feeling another's emotion (say, sadness or anger), rather than just noting the behavioral symptoms of another's emotion. But clinicians must take care not to over-invest their own emotions at the risk of draining away their own resourcefulness; thus awareness of one's own limitations is prudent in a clinical situation, as in caregiving. More fully developed empathy requires more than simply recognizing another's emotional state. Since emotions are typically directed towards objects or states of affairs (either real or imaginary), the empathiser first requires some idea of what that object might be. Next, the empathiser must determine how the emotional feeling will significantly affect the way in which he perceives the other person. The empathizer needs to determine the aspects of the person upon which to focus. Hence he must not only recognize the person toward which the other is directed, but also then recognize the bodily feeling, and then add these components together. The empathiser needs next to find the way into the loop where perception of the other person generates feeling. That feeling affects the perception of the other person. This process occurs before taking in account the character of the other person as well as their wider non-psychological context (such as being short or being a lawyer). When seeking to communicate with another, it may be helpful to demonstrate empathy with the other, to open-up the channel of communication with the other. In this case two methods of simulating empathy are possible: a) either simulate the pretend beliefs, desires, character traits and context of the other and see what emotional feelings this leads to; b) or simulate the emotional feeling directly perceived and then look around for a suitable reason for this to fit. Either way, full empathetic engagement is supposed to help to understand and anticipate the behavior of the other. Empathy may be painful to oneself: seeing the pain of others, especially as broadcasted by mass media, can cause one temporary or permanent clinical depression; a phenomenon which is sometimes called weltschmerz. One must be careful not to confuse empathy with either sympathy, emotional contagion or telepathy. Sympathy is the feeling of compassion for another, the wish to see them better or happier, often described as "feeling sorry" for someone. Emotional contagion is when a person (especially a child or a person in a mob) identifies with strong emotions others are showing and becomes subject to the same emotions themselves. Telepathy is a controversial paranormal phenomenon, which differs in that empathy is based not upon the paranormal but upon sophisticated processing of what is seen and heard in the usual way. Sympathy is, "I'm sorry for your pain." Emotional Contagion is, "I feel your pain." Empathy is, "I understand how you feel." Telepathy is, "I know how you feel because I'm reading your mind." Psychological Perspectives Some experts (psychologists, psychiatrists, and other scientists) believe that not all humans have an ability to feel empathy or perceive the emotions of others. For instance, Autism and related conditions such as Asperger's syndrome are often (but not always) characterized by an apparent reduced ability to empathize with others. The interaction between empathy and autism spectrum disorders is a complex and ongoing field of research, and is discussed in detail below. According to Simon Baron-Cohen's ideas, this absence might be related to an absence of theory of mind (i.e., the ability to model another's world view using either a theory-like analogy between oneself and others, or the ability to simulate pretend mental states and then apply the consequences of these simulations to others). Again, not all autistics fit this pattern, and the theory remains controversial. In contrast, psychopaths are seemingly able to demonstrate the appearance of sensing the emotions of others with such a theory of mind, often demonstrating care and friendship in a convincing manner, and can use this ability to charm or manipulate, but they crucially lack the sympathy or compassion that empathy often leads to. Empathy certainly does not guarantee benevolence. The same ability may underlie schadenfreude (taking pleasure in the pain of another entity) and sadism (being sexually gratified through the infliction of pain or humiliation on another person). Moreover, some research suggests that people are more able and willing to empathize with those most similar to themselves. In particular, empathy increases with similarities in culture and living conditions. We are also more likely to empathize with those with which we interact more frequently. Developing skills of empathy is often a central theme in the recovery process for drug addicts. Even more, people can empathize with animals. As such, empathy is thought to be a driving psychological force behind the animal rights movement (an example of sympathy), whether or not using empathy is justified by any real similarity between the emotional experiences of animals and humans. Empathy and Autism Spectrum Disorders A common source of confusion in analyzing the interactions between empathy and ASD is that the apparent lack of empathy may mask at least two other underlying causes: • Excessive sensitivity or "overwhelm," may be a cause of early learned suppression. • Failure to demonstrate empathy can arise from inability (or not knowing how) to express empathy to others, as opposed to difficulty feeling it internally. A higher level of empathy is sometimes reported by individuals with mild or high functioning Asperger's syndrome, especially to animals and to other deeply held emotions in people - anecdotally this may more often be so with "high-functioning" individuals, or possibly, the strength of negative empathic feelings with people might itself have been a contributing cause of retreat into self. Empathy in animals Some students of animal behavior claim that empathy is not restricted to humans as the definition implies. Examples include dolphins saving humans from drowning or from shark attacks, and a multitude of behaviors observed in primates, both in captivity and in the wild. Rodents have been shown to demonstrate empathy for cagemates (but not strangers) in pain. Organic basis Research in recent years has focused on possible brain processes as concomitant with empathy.Functional imaging has recently been employed to investigate the functional anatomy of empathy: Farrow et al found that empathic judgments activated left superior frontal gyrus, orbitofrontal gyrus, precuneus, left anterior middle temporal gyrus and inferior frontal gyrus. Components of this circuit may be dysfunctional in psychopathy (Tunstall N., Fahy T. and McGuire P. in: Guide to Neuroimaging in Psychiatry, Eds. Fu C et al, Martin Dunitz: London 2003). Furthermore, the discovery of mirror neurons in monkeys that fire both when the creature watches another perform an action as well as when they themselves perform it presents a possible neural mechanism for mapping others' feelings onto one's own nervous system. In Bower (2005) the function of these mirror cells was further investigated. They may be related to awareness of the goal-directedness of actions. These neurons "may be responsible for understanding the intention of action in other people," Kiyoshi Nakahara and Yasushi Miyashita, both of the University of Tokyo School of Medicine said in a note which accompanies the Bower action. Dapretto et al. (2006) found that, as opposed to normally developing children, high-functioning children with autism showed no mirror neuron activity in the brain's inferior frontal gyrus (pars opercularis) while imitating and observing emotional expressions. The authors suggest this supports the hypothesis that a dysfunctional mirror neuron system may underlie the social deficits observed in autism. Development of empathy By the age of 2, children normally begin to display the fundamental behaviors of empathy by having an emotional response that corresponds with another person. Sometimes, toddlers will comfort others or show concern for them as early as 24 months of age. Also during the second year, toddlers will play games of falsehood or "pretend" in an effort to fool others, and this requires that the child know what others believe before he or she can manipulate those beliefs. Other Aspects In addition to the above use, the term empathy is also used by some people to signify their heightened or higher sensitivity to the emotions and state of others. This, reportedly, can lead to both positive aspects such as a more skilled instinct for what is "behind the scenes" with people, but also to difficulties such as rapid over-stimulation, overwhelm or stress caused by an inability to protect oneself from this so-called 'pick-up'. Such people may for example find crowds stressful simply due to picking up what is often described as "white noise" or multiple emotions as they pass through it, a phenomenon not to be confused with agoraphobia and sometimes informally known as crowd-sickness. Empathy in this sense is ascribed by such people to various mechanisms. These include simply more sophisticated subconscious processing of sensory cues or stronger emotional feedback than the norm, (i.e. the normal human experience but more so), and therefore fit within present models. Some people, perhaps due to synesthesia, believe it instead to be a direct emotional sense or a feel for others' "energy". The New Age religion has constructed a belief system around anecdotal evidence of persons who claim to be "empaths" in this sense. This aspect of empathy is not clinically recognized, and someone calling themselves an "empath" usually does not intend to imply that they are gifted with any psychic ability. A recurrent theme of discussion on such websites relates to the impact upon individuals, and therefore also methods (including mental practices, emotional processes and ritual) which anecdotally can help reduce the intensity of empathic reactions to others' feelings to a more bearable level (informally called 'shielding' or emotional detachment). Fiction The empathic process is exploited to a certain extent in all kinds of fiction, thus we may identify deeply with characters appearing in books, plays or films (see especially Currie 2004). In some works of science fiction and fantasy, empathy is understood to be a paranormal or psychic ability to sense the emotions of others, as opposed to telepathy, which allows one to perceive thoughts as well. A person who has that ability is also called an "empath" or "telempath" in this context.