A lot has changed in my life, some good I guess most would say, some not so good... A dark cloud ruled my days for a while and Id like to share some of that time.. Feel free to comment and let me know your thoughts....
Gone
I'm gone.
I'm so far gone you wouldn't even know
So far gone I won't even show.
I'm so far gone and there's no way out
so far gone I just want to shout.
I'm so far gone you could never hear me scream
So far gone you wouldn't hear a thing.
I'm too far gone I try and let you see.
So far gone you wouldn't notice me.
I'm so far gone drowning in quick sand.
So far gone there is no helping hand.
I'm too far gone you can't help me.
So far gone I tried, begged on one knee.
I wish you could understand how much pain one could withstand.
I try to be brave yet I have drowned,
I'm in so deep to deep for you to notice,
to deep for you to care I'm gone now nothings left.
I should only hope you learn,
it was never your fault.
The depression cut me
to deep for you see to deep for you too feel.
The Pain is bigger then me,
I tried to fight.
I'm just gone now.
I'm sorry
Me
Can't you see
The pain in my eyes?
But this is me
And my life.
If you hold me close
You can hear my heart
It cries more than most
From being torn apart.
After every breath I take,
After every fight I witness,
I ask "why must I awake?"
Will I ever conquer forgiveness?
Can you ever truly
Forgive without forgetting?
I am lonely.
My life I am abandoning.
From pain I am running.
Even though these tears are streaming
I will never look back.
All in all,
I have one question to ask.
Would you still catch me if I fall?
Maybe one day you will see.
This is how I live,
And this is me.
What happened to me?
Where is that cheerful girl I used to know?
I look in the mirror and it's like I don't even recognize myself.
I look so down and tired, I don't see that girl that was so happy so long ago.
What happened to the days I would smile?
Where are the days that my heart wouldn't break?
Where have I gone?
I see that girl when I look in the mirror, but she's too far gone.
I can't bring her back to life she's feeling to much strife.
I feel her inside me, but my depression won't let her come out.
I think the old me is gone without doubt.
Feel Again
Much time I now spend, watching
Watching as others pass by, living
Living their lives
I watch not for care of wanting to know them
Or even so as to learn from what they do and say
I simply watch…and wonder
Wondering why. Why do I feel this way
Wondering how. How have I come to this point
Wondering when. When can I ever hope to feel again
As I watch, I remember
Remember what it was like…
To feel as they feel
To laugh as they laugh
To cry as they cry
To hope as they hope
To hurt as they hurt
To love, to hate, to long, to fear, to yearn…to rejoice…to live
But such is all that I have…memories
Memories which flow before my mind’s eye
Even as the people flow before my gaze
And I, I sit quietly in the shadow…
And wonder
