XDreamingDifferentlyX's blog: "dreaming differently..."

Update on life... I am currently working my ass off 5 days a week, starting cancer meds, and keeping my head up.... I am still single, but thats ok.... yes i know i should be with someone but thats just not a priority to me right now...itd be nice to date and all but i am in no rush either...Well any comments, questions, concerns? message them to me :) HUGS TO ALL!

goodbye....ill be on off and on..but im moving from this shithole called garner...outta state hopefully... i dont wanna talk about it really...just need to let you know i guess...either way..its been nice knowing everyone....i need something to hold me back but she doesnt exist and im still here alone so fuck it...i love ya all ... muah:: ill be on later this week... stephen.

i dont trust anything...or anyone sometimes....i think all this is a joke to me....you see i want to find something new..someone new and this place builds your hopes and crushes them because no one is themselves on here,...very few are and i know who you are....you do too so dont fret....but i am not happy with the way things are going....so change my opinion?...i doubt it but you can try...either way ill be here none the less huh?....stupid shit...ssdd.... later

so i watched saw 1 2 and 3 the past 3 nights and each night i have these weird dreams/nightmares....i still cant classify it...but my first dream last night was about a little girl i know (5-7yrs old?) having a scorpion in here hand and kept trying to put it on me....that was freaky/scary...and this one from this morning is hard to remember for some reason...weird huh?....well heres to another boring ass fucking blog for you to read and me to bleed...not really bleeding thouGH:)

so heres my dreams for last night/this morning... im dreaming about breaking into a prison to get $152,000 with like 3 or 4 other people and when the prisoners find out we broke in they start to evacuate the building to find us, and we try to leave with them. i end up having the money on me in the end, so i get to the gate to leave and all my accomplocises have already escaped, but i cant find my id so they are leary of letting me go... thats how it ends with 2 of the escaped accomplocises coming back through the gate to try and take the money from me without the gaurd seeing, but i wont let em.... the end of that dream/nightmare....see thats what im talking about. i dont know how to classify my dreams/nightmares anymore... :P "how can i change tommorrow, if i cant change today?" - hatebreed

see but i dont get it....its all the same you say... and well i dont think you understand... you see theres a difference between right and wrong and then theres this grey area... where you dont know how things should be because theres more than 2 options and both look lousy and the 3rd option is somewhere in the middle... well heres the plan.... forget them all and find a new path... you see people lie and nothing that comes out of their mouths is truth, so search for the right and wrong in it all and youll find that the grey area is where you usually end up.... even in my dreams i dont know the difference between my nightmares and my dreams now....sometimes im not even sure how to classify them...so what would you do?....would you cut yourself off from the world or would you hold out for another round and just be left in the dark on what other people are really thinking about you and your situation?....either way...its hard to trust anything or anyone when you feel this indecisive...i mean look at the shit i just wrote...im not even sure if it makes sense but i bet itll be different from what youre used to... the only way up is down sometimes...then back up... "dont play nintendo with my life....or my heart"... -me-