Dj Sykotic Dreamz's blog: "True Inner Feelings"

They want me to push you away. They say you hurt me, but I don't want to believe. For I find a certain safety in your arms of ugliness, the only things that want to embrace me lately. And even when I think I'm done with this abuse, I don't know the sweet words that will sweep you away, some old childhood incantation that crawled away from my bitter memory when it turned its back for a moment. You are a sickness; I cannot control you, though there are magical concoctions that can. But I cannot make the quest for them alone, and you have me feeling as though there's no one who loves enough to help. They don't believe me when I tell them that you have taken over who I am. I know not if they deny your power, your existenance, or the fact that you have chosen me for your victim. I only want to go back and forget I ever looked into your dark eyes. But it is too late and I feel as though our tainted courtship has ruined everything. You do not comfort me when I cry in dark cornors, but you push those who try away. Please don't tell me I must learn to live this way. Yes, you inspire me, but is it worth it? I know this answer no better than any of those to the other biting questions you use to beat me down with.