Zombie X-Mas
So there's a small town like totally sleepy and hickish.
There's a mill or something that everyone works at.
The zombies are coming about because of a necromancer. Except not really who cares. The point is, they're here!
The town has to deal with all these fucking zombies and basically get out of town and not get eaten and shit.
The cast of charecters will include
The Deputy. The sherrif is going to be a zombie and one part someone will shoot him and they say to the deputy "I shot the sherriff, but I did not shoot the deputy." or maybe that song can start playing and theres a montage of zombie slaying! The deputy is young, and unsure of himself. A total faggot actually. Scared of girls but comes to it when it counts. That guy who is all butt hurt about slaying zombies. He has a dog.
The grizzled old trucker. This guy is a total ass hole. ZZ Tops looking mother fucker right? Okay he's got a double barrell sawed off shotty in his cab. He's also gay.
A conveinance store clerk. This guy works at like a seven eleven. When the shit starts he's there working and like "Whoa! WTF?" Then he pulls out a bat from behind the counter and starts fucking all these zombies up. Then ZZ tops saves his ass cuz he blows a zombie away thats about to chow down on gas station man. He's a young guy too, like early mid twenties.
Bubble gum chewing skank. She's in the gas station too when the shit pops off. SHe totally becomes a zombie later and attacks people. THis will be foreshadowed because she's always chewing on bubble gum and shit and there will be lots of shots of her mouth. She's going to have a pretty mouth, sexy lips. Then all of sudden, fuck they're all bloody with ragged chunks of human flesh. She's wearing lots of bright colors too and her hair is dyed some wierd ass colors.
Librarian lady. She's quiet and stuff. Wears glasses. Kind of plain, but actually hot. You know the type! She reads a lot so maybe she can realize something important out that will help all these people out later. Like hey, zombies die if you poke them in the head. Or maybe she will have knowledge of all these home made explosives and shit. Then they can all be blown away (double entendre!) by her un orthadox knowledge that will help them kill faggots.
Farm boy. So he's in town doing something and he's like really red neck stupid fuck. He's scared of girls too. Oooh so he's going to fuck the bubble gum girl cuz like she's a total skank. BUt she's been bitten so she turns while their fucking and bites his fucking face off. It's going to be epic. Probably the best part of the whole movie! This guy has zero personality too, we don't want anyone to feel bad when it happens.
Mall santa. Okay so maybe he's not working in a mall, but the small town equivalant. He's an old dude who does this every hear. He's kind of fat and jolly. Maybe he works at the mill or whatever the towns main source of income is all year, but he wants to be fucking santa clause. Of course he has to turn into a zombie because how can we not have a zombie santa. He will of course be one of the last ones to go.
Nun lady. She's going to be a fat overweight nun- and a total bad ass. Maybe she slams zombies with holy water. Maybe it will work. Maybe she won't use it. This is a definate maybe for the cast. I mean a nun sounds cool at first, but what the fuck am I going to do with a nun? Chainsaws maybe. We have ot put a wood chipper in there too somewhere. Maybe a preacher instead. I think nun is cooler but it maybe harder to pull of then the preacher dude.
Alcoholic author guy. He's trying to write a novel in the sleepy town. Maybe he's famouse and he came her to get over his writers block. Then zombies eat his face or not.
Native American guy. Okay so he's all about helping the earth and stuff. Totally stereo typical. But who the fuck cares. It will be the noble savage stereo type. Like he will help them escape maybe because he knows teh woods. But perhaps in the movies climax they have ot fight like a fucking zombie bear! Whoa!!!! This sounds cool, but I don't think it's going to happen. Zombie bears are too much of a total mind fuck.
A pakistani computer tech dude would be cool. Until zombies ate him. "Were experiencing a high volume of calls right now..." Crowbar to the head by mall santa. Then he can say "You've been out sourced!" or "Out source this!" Oh instead of it being a pakastani it can be the mill owner who is going to shut down the mill and screw the town over so he can outsource his work to like China or something. Maybe he won't even be a zombie when mall santa fucking stabs him in the head with a crowbar. Like maybe he sees an oppertunity and takes it. Fuck ya.
